really just cry and do nothing..
but i dont want to cry alone..
sigh...
i really hopes the tears will stop soon...
im tired of crying myself to bed, and wake myself up with swollen eyes.
its tiring to go through it almost every nights.
whats happening?
whirling and spinning.. it happened so fast..
im still trying to adjust to it..
its so difficult! but im still trying..
i really am.. but its so hard...
and im so tired out already..
i just wish everything was a nightmare..
that i can just forget the moment i wakes up.
this is hard.... tmd hard...
i guess, i was too used relying on others.
and when one left, i falls.. a hard and fast fall..
i need to get use to singlehood..
i need to put him off his mind..
however, everything i do remind me of him..
every place i go, every thing i do, every words i say..
it will somehow be linked to him..
its like the wound kept being teared open and open, over and over again..
how can i ever recover from it..
and the worst thing is, i felt that he is enjoying himself outside.
playing and fooling around, i dont feel tt he felt any hurts or pain about the breakup.
everything he said was nothing but lies.
i should haven given up long ago...
i should..... why didnt i....
i need a hug...
a tight hug.. coz i dont want to cry alone, in the long night..
i fear night....
it makes me feel more upset and lonely...
sighs....