<body> <body>
LGO
Myriad of untold truth.
Date : Friday, August 29, 2008
all i wanna do now is put my head into my pillow and scream.

i never knew i could hurt like this.

gone forever...

i had a nightmare this morning.
a bad one i guess.
and it woke me up far before my alarm time.
i wonder is it meant to be this way.
coz the moment i open my eyes,
my phone starting ringing.
i saw big cousin, meiling's sms.
she going back tml tgt with me. =S
its good to have company, but not really that good when it is big cousin.
once i saw the sms
" meiping, ah por had passed away. we are taking the 3pm express train back tml. u wan join us? i'l get the tickets"
my mind shut off, i went blank...
it tooks me very very long to absorb the news in.
till now, this moment i still cant believe it.
pls tell me its a joke alright. a bad joke.
i shouldnt came out tt fast last week. =/
i didnt get to see popo for the last time.
i knew it was coming..... but i doesnt want face it...
last week, when i held her hand i felt some bad......
sigh.... all along i thought i was thinking too much..
popo, why u nv wait for me?
u said u wanna watch me grad, get married and have childrens.
i told anto before, if one day we really end up tgt and get married.
i want my children to go back malaysia. i want them to spend time with my popo. =(
but it will never come true anymore. its so unfair tt da jie n er jie manage to do so.
popo even went for their wedding.
from now onwards i dont look forwards going back malaysia anymore....
popo, i miss you..
just one more day only, why dont wait for me? WHY?!
i hate everyone in the family!
they kept everything from me.
so what if im having exam on fri? i do have the rights to know everything.
why do the adult like to do thing their way?
they always, yes always thing they are doing the best for me.
but have they stand in my shoe and think?
keeping the truth doesnt helps at all..
please, i beg anyone. just tell me its all a joke. =,(







all your life, u devoted urself to the family.
never a single time giving up on us. no matter what mistake we had made.
u always accept and gave it.
all ur nagging and scolding, its all for our own good.
u always gave the best to us.
and i always hope i can give the best to u too.
thats why i kept studying hoping to get a good job, so that i can provide the best for u.
u already overcome so many things, why this time u didnt?
why why why?
popo, i miss you....

meiping || 2:39 AM

Date : Thursday, August 28, 2008
and i know it sounds confusing,
but at that moment,
i just wanted to walk out of the room i was in,
sit down in the middle of the hall way,
and cry. just cry.

I Know How It Feels
to be on the edge of your bed
your head buried in your hands
tears running down your face
wishing everything would just end.

we all are a little damaged.
some of us hide it better than others,
but on some level we are all torn up.
we take it out on others and beat through life carrying it all,
and we will end up damaging someone else.
and most of the time we won't even notice or bother to care,
because we are busy with our own little disaster.

meiping || 9:05 AM

Date : Wednesday, August 27, 2008
im down with HFMD la!
of all time why now?!
WTF LA!
WHY NOW THIS TIMING!

=(
another issue..
i dont bear to say it at all..
sigh...
popo, must wait for me alright!
u must!

meiping || 10:48 PM

Date : Monday, August 25, 2008
POPO!
u haven see me get married and have children yet u knw?
u said before want to see me get married and have children de, u cannot break ur promise ok?
must get well! don't give up!
jiayou! u can overcome this de!

meiping || 11:22 PM

Date :
oh! i reached my 600th post.
wad a long way i have come.

just came back from malaysia not long ago.
i have gt so much to rant about.
but i don't know where to start from.
there is so much emotion running through me these few days.
=(
feeling moody......
edited post. =)
fancy me blogging now, guess where am i? muhaha. im at the lib nw, using my phone to blog. xD
back in my, there is so much thing happening.. sigh. when will all this stop? it seems non-stop happening.
i have always been reminded that everything happens for a reason. i search in vain for those reasons...
u guys knw wad? stuffs that been show in money nt enough two seems to be happening right nw at home. =( and i cant seems to do anything abt it. feeling helpless.
i feel like voicing it out, but i also knw the seriousness. hence i kept mute. =s
i had the urge to go back "there" and work. well, no risk no gain. tts the fastest way to get soild hard cold cash. but... sigh..
er jie there is hopeless... the faster the divorce is set the better it will be for both families and the childrens.
negative thoughs...... im scare...
i feel so alone.. and will be even more lonely soon. jw leaving sg soon. =(
we all knew this day will come, bt have been avoiding it for the past two yr. now the date has come, we cant deny nor avoid it anymore. jw rem to tc of urself over there k. rem to come bk sg more often. rem to call us every week! even we will be world apart u will still be my best fren! =) i wil nt send u off next week k. i don bear to see u walk through the airport gate..... jiayo!! there sure gt alot blones babes waiting for u de k. love u always bro!

meiping || 3:28 AM

Date : Friday, August 15, 2008
whats the point of holding on?
stubborn?
really whats the point of holding on to the past?
over is over.
its already a history, a past.
i know it is easier said than done ya?

sweetie baby called me again. =)
my xiao gua are so so so cute!

meiping || 12:08 PM

Date : Saturday, August 09, 2008
a big haha to myself.
i fine myself so amusing sia.
i went read thru some of my past entries.
it seems tt this yr almost all of my blog entries are full of saddness, unhappiness.
why is my life so full of shit?
when did i really really blog about something tt makes me rem?
instead i kept blogging about stuffs tt causes me pains and hurts.
im so sick of myself..
so tired of being label by family, friends and even lover..
im so tensed up nowaday.
im like at the verge of breaking out now and then.
be it outside or home.
be it with who or alone...
i dont like it. dont like the sudden mood swing.
sigh. im so useless. such a failure.

Palm trees,
Ocean breeze,
Standing by the clear blue sea.
Hot air,
sunkissed hair.
Endless summer,
take me there.

"i can't judge any of you.
i have no malice against you & no ribbons for you
but i think it's high time
you all start looking at yourselves,
& judging the lie that you live in."


是不是见到了,接触到的越多, 就越容易迷失掉那个最单纯,最简单的自我.


l.o.s.t

meiping || 9:26 PM

Date : Friday, August 08, 2008
累了。。 好累啊。。
不想再想,不想再被压力捆住。
我要自由。我要我的生活。像同龄的人一样!
什么也不想,什么也不烦。
渐渐的放开,放下。
对了,就是要这样!
要开心。

我要去喝酒,唱歌,看电影,兜风,吃吃喝喝!
我要去happy!

要开开心心的过每天!
因为明天可能就是最后一天。

晚安!
<3

meiping || 2:28 AM

Date : Tuesday, August 05, 2008
seriously enough is enough.
why do people like to assume thing.
once they think they are right, other will always be in the wrong.
what does this prove?
selfish? living in their own world? own thinking?
different thinking? different world?
different growing up? different family?
for goodness.. ENOUGH!
i hate the feeling of those ppl who think they are always right.
i hate the feeling that they think they are right, and im in the wrong.
without even asking, comfirming, understanding.
u might nt have a reason to do thing.
but i have my own reason to do my thing.
not that one is more imt to another.
is just the matter of seriousness between both issue.
ARGH!

jiewei
both of us has been friends for so long.
i don't wish this kind of thing to put our relationship/ friendship down.
the kind of sisterhood, brotherhood, friends, and family links between us.
i would really wish us to be back like the back.
laughing, joking and playing around.
sharing, listening and understand each other.
dont because of drank then throw temper on me.
not the first time. not the second time.
but do let it be the last time.
lets us put down the thing. i dont wish to think abt it anymore.
let it be at peace.

nowaday i really been changing. small small thing...
i even began going to the k n sing alone.
last time in the past i would never ever do that.
never... but i did it. alone. =)
yeaa~~ alone! alone!
i should be happier for the chances, coz i wouldn have to depend on others.
i also stop asking friends out, coz i wil stop the effort...
all the replys i get most of the time would be sorry, im with my bf/gf.
im lazy to go out. im tired, too far, no money, no mood.
blah blah blah~ so on n so on. tons n tons of excuses.
but wadever it is.
nothing is forever, only death is forever.
something is beginning to chance..
i would sit down, listen to songs....
then something wil flash thru my mind...
something, just i dono wad..
but it will just make tears well up my eyes...
unknowingly... i wil jus tear.. ?
lolx so werid... i hope things will get better...
around me.. my family, my friends, relationship.

i heard from jie tt ahpa has completed his first chemo session.
the next session will be at sept. =)
hopefully things wil go well for him!

No, I don't hate you,
i don't want to fight.
you know I'll always love you
but right now I just don't like you
cause you took this too far.

i wish in life there is a delete button..

meiping || 3:20 AM

Date : Friday, August 01, 2008
做李美萍很难。做李宗花不容易。
伤心,伤害,受伤,欺骗,遗弃,遗忘。

recently, i learnt to be more dependble on myself.
shop , eat , study , travel all alone.
baby has change to a new outlet, therefore different working timing.
=) which is gd i guess.
good for both of us.
i changed..
i began to stop minding so much abt friends.
i began to stop minding abt how my family treats me.
i began to stop caring abt how my friends thinks of me or wad so ever.
i began to stop taking the words my mom comments abt me.
i began to shop alone, buy stuff all these.
i began to eat lunch and dinner alone.
i began watching movie alone.
i began going to the libray and study alone.
i began travel to and fro alone too.
i began to cry alone.
i began to talk to myself, sharing stuff with myself. consoling myself.
i began gaming myself.
which normally i don't.
i fear loney, i dislike the feeling.
but i know,
i should nt depend so much on others.
when i know, no matter how close , how good ones can be.
i will still be hurt by the words and action.
it is undenible.
fact it, accept it.
i want to close myself up....
shut myself completely...

and the limited time with baby is a gd chance for me to slow thing down between us.
the river between us seems to have grown.
is the feeling slowly ......................
i don't knw, shall see in time to come.

i really really really wish i was like 4yr old?
skinned knee caps is so much easy to heal then skinned soul.

i was having such a super stupid idea and thinking last week.
i had those kind of thinking again.
which i knw i must not have.
its not right. it is sinful.
i must not repeat it.
i cannot allow people to tear for me.
i cannot hurt people.
i cannot hurt family.
i cannot hurt dear.
i cannot hurt friends.
i cannot, i cannot , i really cannot...

therefore i think it is better i stay clear of mind,
buy a couple of nice books, charge my mp4 everyday.
cannot affort to have an mintues to idles.
cause i dont want to think, i dont want tt idea back...

im so tired.......of life.......
really really really very tired......................

meiping || 2:56 AM

Date : Monday, July 28, 2008
Not gonna put in any more effort.
i guess enough is enough.
there is a limit to everything.
appreciate it or fuck it.

One after another one.
Do Re Mi is it.

what said is said.
what done is done.
accept it, fact it.
even if u cant accept it, suck thumb and face the fact.

dont assume thing..
assumstion cause misunderstanding,
which will result in unhappiness.

two word - holy shit

anyway, nothing much happen recently.
only that, one down makes one even more down.
don understand? nvm, its nt important.
not one of my best year ya.
result of this year so far,
i see my dip cert coming in.
i guess thats the only result so far.

drinking this coming tue and wed i guess.
好想不醉不归,什么也忘了。。。
time after time.

called back to MY, arh~ xiao gua are so cute. =)
宝贝哲哲,恒恒和明明~
阿姨好想你们! =)
有空我会回去的!
会买好吃好玩的给你们!
宝贝宝贝~ 要乖。

meiping || 4:07 AM

Date : Monday, July 21, 2008
The funny thing is,
nobody really ever knows how much anybody else is hurting.
we could be standing next to somebody
who is completely broken,
and we wouldn't even know.

i wish i can feel the hurt daddy is going thru..
the usual laugher has fade away, no longer seeing the smiles on his face..
no longer able to see him enjoy himself with the three xiaogua.

im back from malaysia. a short trip back.
wishing i didnt go back...
dont ask me why... just dont feel like...
dont like the feeling im getting...
dont like the feeling of holding back...
dont like the feeling of lonliness...
dont like alot of thing...
i hate everything...

meiping || 2:45 AM

Date : Wednesday, July 16, 2008
there are jus some classmates who are full of shit... =.=!
rather be loner and do everything myself then to group works.
not saying all, but just some of them..
there is always a black sheep yea?
this gal, kept bugging for group work, fine, group work then.
6week before say group tgt do the assignment tgt with another 2 gals.
fine, waited n waited n waited for her sms to let me knw when meeting to do.
until 2 day before the deadline she sms-ed.
last min sms and say meet at 2pm. -.-! pls la.
think everyone like u everyday camp sch?! zzzzzz
heng i already done most of my assignment stuffs.
if not i gonna curse and swear instead of just typing it like this.

No matter wad u say, it not gonna affect me at all. =)

meiping || 11:32 PM

Date : Monday, July 14, 2008
人家说女人被骗
第一次是纯真,
第二次是无知,
第三次就是愚蠢.

我只知道
第一次是偶然,
第二次是必然,
第三次是命中注定.

quote it from 命中注定,我爱你.

meiping || 12:09 AM

Date : Tuesday, July 08, 2008
無法忘懷的是往事
青春原是會凋零的
曾經共同擁有的往事
被歲月漸漸蝕去
別說我不在乎往事
它,使我難忘…

揮不去的是情愛
擇你所愛
愛你所選
情與愛是一生
最美又最深的回憶
無法從記憶中揮去
讓你我珍藏…

躲不掉的是那份緣
一生只有一回
幾番欲死欲生的愁悵
也不過是短暫心事的糾纏
因為緣 才編織了
無數人與人之間的邂逅
讓我們擁有這份緣…

=)
thanks for ur stealing the star from the sky for me.
lolx!
thanks for making such a big xi shen! hee
but dam cute can~ would be better if u would let me take a picture of it..
><
i gonna bother u till u let me take picutre~
always my sister cum bother! <3~

hmm...
why would two people whom use to be so close can get so distance suddenly?
avoiding each other calls and msg..
and even treatin each other as stranger..
not saying hi or bye...
werid... why is it so sia?

meiping || 3:58 AM

something is wrong...
Date : Sunday, July 06, 2008
u knw u knw u knw, there is so so so much going thru my mind right now....

i so so so worry abt papa!
wonder how the chemo goes for him..
was it good or bad?
hows the result..
i so so so wish tt i could be by his side..
going thru everything with him.
i knw its painful and depressing for him..
but papa always never say out. which hurt me more.
=(

papa u must get well...
i dont care, i want u to get well, i demand it..
because....
i want u to see me grad from school,
i want u to watch me walk down the red carpet,
i want u take care of my future children,
i want u to be there when all of these happen...
promise me another 50 yrs of ur life can?
promise me u wil be with me going thru everything...
i love you papa.
i do love you...

--------------------------------------------------------------

u are suppose to be out of my life long ago....
why are u always popping out of no where...
dono why suddenly when u pop out once again,
i feel so uneasy.... =S

--------------------------------------------------------------

am feeling so far and distance from you....

--------------------------------------------------------------

i dono wad future has hold for me...
i feel so scare suddenly............

--------------------------------------------------------------

will friends be forever?
or is there such thing call forever...
okay there is no forever......

--------------------------------------------------------------

遗憾是会呼吸的痛

meiping || 3:29 AM

Date : Tuesday, July 01, 2008
lalalas~
the sky is so high the sea is so blue....
muahah im mad la... XD

Saying nothing,
sometimes says the most.

you have to learn from your mistakes,
and grow.
and know that if it can happen once,
it can happen twice.

life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass,
it's about learning to dance in the rain.

through humor,
you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers.
and once you've found laughter,
no matter how painful your situation might be,
you can survive it.

through humor,
you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers.
and once you've found laughter,
no matter how painful your situation might be,
you can survive it.

there's never an ending,
just new beginnings.
the past makes you who you are,
but won't predict who you'll be.
you choose who you'll become.

in the end it doesnt matter
how many friends you had,
all that really matters is
how many stayed with you.

everyone's going to hurt you sooner or later
you just have to decide
who's worth going through the pain.

hate is baggage.
life's too short to be pissed off all the time.
it's just not worth it.

lots of people want to ride with me in the limo,
but what i want is someone
who will take the bus with me
when the limo breaks down.

Sometimes someone comes into your life
that changes everything.
Raises your standards,
makes you laugh
and makes you feel like you.
There's something about that person
thatyou cant put into words
and even though you're not with them,
you dont want to let them go.
thats friends.

here's going to be a lot of change in your life.
It's not the changes that matter,
it's how you react to the changes.
That's what makes you who you are.

One of the hardest moments in life is
deciding whether you should give up or try harder.

you don't get to choose how you are going to die or when.
you can only decide
how you're going to live now.

sometimes it's easier to say you don't care.
than to explain all the reasons why you do.
Stop worrying about what might hold you down,
and pay attention to why you're standing up.

numbring the pain for a while
makes it worse when you finally feel it.

Faith is taking the first step even
when you don't see the whole staircase.

Even if your hands are shaking and your faith is broken,
even as your eyes are closing do it with a heart wide open.
Say what you need to say.

Friends ask why you're crying.
Best friends already have a shovel
ready to bury the loser who made you cry.

Never bend your head.
Always hold it high.
Don't be afraid to look the world straight in the eye.

Smile,
even if you aren't happy,
becuase if your wear a smile on your face
it might spread to your heart.

Live life how you would want to live it.
Don't follow examples,
make them.

keep your head up.
keep your chin up and most importantly,
keep smiling.
because life's a beautiful thing and
there's so much to smile about.

here’s to the nights we felt alive,
here’s to the tears you knew you’d cry.
here’s to goodbye,
tomorrow’s gonna come too soon.

Bad things are always going to happen in life.
People will hurt you.
But you can`t use that as an excuse to hurt someone back.
You`ll only hurt yourself.

Like a rainbow after the rain,
there's always good that follows the pain.

Life has only three guarantees.
Smiling will brighten your face,
laughing will enhance your eyes,
and falling in love will change your life.

some things can't and shouldn't be fixed.
it's over for a reason,
and deep down inside,
you probably know what that reason is.

the best and most beautiful things in the world
cannot be seen or touched,
but are felt in the heart.

obstacles are olaced in our way to determine
whether we truly want something
or just think we do.

feelings never change,
you just learn how to hide them.

we all have obligations in life that go beyond boundaries.

There are two ways to be happy,
improve your reality or lower your expectations.

I believe we write our own stories
and each time we think we know the ending - we don't.
Perhaps luck exists somewhere between the world of planning,
the world of chance and in peace that comes from
knowing you just can't know it all.
You know,
life's funny that way.
Once you let go of the wheel,
you might end up right where you belong.

It started out like any other summer.
every single joy and fear,
that's how we found each other and
we found ourselves.
So I stand here in the rain,
waiting for it to cleanse me,
waiting for it to wash me away.

It's the beauty in the tales we tell.
It's the pushing through and ending well,
And finding strength to give ourselves away.
In the midst of passing bravery,
In the face of our own injury,
It's the constant generosity of grace.

Ride the winds and climb,
Spread your wings and fly,
'Cause it's all a state of mind.

At the end of the day,
you can either focus On what's tearing you apart,
or what's Holding you together.
It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it,
but it's also true that we don't know
what we've been missing until it arrives.

It is better to sleep on things beforehand
than lie awake about them afterwards.

In the long run,
the pessimist may be right,
but the optimist has a better time on the trip.

Act as if what you do makes a difference.
It does.

"I have put my heart and soul into my work,
and have lost my mind in the process."

If you don't go after what you want,
you'll never get it.
If you don't ask,
the answer is always no.
If you don't step forward,
you're always in the same place.

You just don't understand do you?
Everytime i talk to you it gets worse.
The little butterflies, my stomach dropping,
the spinning, the feeling like everything
is all right in the world.
These never stop. They keep coming back.

You change for two reasons
either you learn enough that you want to,
or you've been hurt enough that you have to.

oops.. longlong post..
keke~ copy paste de la!
but i <3 <3 the words words.

meiping || 10:05 AM

Date : Sunday, June 29, 2008
=)
i added another new baby to my collection. =x
SAMSUNG OMNIA
with the big support from aunty n cousin..
thanks to huahua de info..
both of us are happy girls? women? lady? arh wadever..

hence i wil stop using 90122948.
and wil be passing down my k810i to daddy.

meiping || 4:27 AM

Date : Thursday, June 26, 2008
好烦啊!!!
烦死了啦!!
相通了一件又来一件!
气死了!

meiping || 12:41 AM

Date : Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Bachelor of Business in Convention and Event Management
(Awarded by Southern Cross University, AUS)

Objectives

Specially designed for the fast growing Business Events industry
Designed to give students the skills and knowledge required to build a career in the management, planning and marketing of corporate events, conventions and meetings, festivals and special events

Sepcialisation Units

Project Management for Conventions, Events and Festivals
Theming and Staging for Convention and Event Tourism
Events Management

Bachelor of Business in Hotel and Resort Management
(Awarded by Southern Cross University, AUS)

Objectives

Designed to give students the skills to become hospitality industry leaders capable of managing international hotel and resort operations or to succeed in running hospitality enterprises of their own
Provide a strong focus on management skills relating to the operations of hotels and resorts
Allow students to become familiar with the practical aspects of the hospitality industry and the strategic management issues involved in operating international resorts and hotels
Prepare graduates for management careers in industry sectors such as hotels, resorts, cruise liners, restaurants, catering organisations, clubs and casinos

Specialisation Units

Foodservice Operations
Managing Rooms Division Operations
Contemporary Workplace Relations Issues for Tourism and Hospitality

hmmmm... after so much tots, another question pops up..
2 courses to choose from... hmmmm.....
another round of confusion....
both intakes at feb and july....
hmmmm....

meiping || 11:36 PM

Date : Monday, June 23, 2008
=)
was kinda of tied up last few days.
fri went zoo with hua, laoeh and hua de fren (ling).
after the zoo, went shopping for xf's bdae present.
bought adidas watch, daisy and a white tiger for her..
sat had an early celebration for her at newyork newyork.
woots, the price was ex! >aftermath sunday met xf and co again..
her actual day.. =)
sorry gals tt i overslept!
been kinda of long since i had so much miss call!
they called till my hp went flat!!! =x
keke!
met them at amk hub for movie..
this month has been movie movie movie!!
lots of nice shows coming up too.. waiting for wall-e~~~~
still kinda of long sia... boreddd...

hmmm............
i think........ i have sort of decided to cont with my studies...
im taking up degree after i have make sure i completed my dip...
its kinda of a burden to both my dad and me... =/
tts why i have been thinking for a long time...
the medic fees he has to bear and also my studies fee..
i have used up all my saving... the course will cost another 30k at least...
><
i seriously dono how to open up to dad and tell him... sigh...

PS- HUA! i cfm 29th is ur bday le! MUHAHA! i not gonna tell u how i did. but i just did!! =XXX

meiping || 11:42 PM

Date : Wednesday, June 18, 2008
firstly belated happi birthday to junwei, lionel and joseph. =)
had a mini BBQ session for my bday with boi, xf, hua , milo, yl, alfie and lance.
had lots of suprises. thanks alot guys. ^.^v
love the presents lot~
after the BBQ, went back to boi's hus to wash up.
had mj session, longest in my life.. >.<
we started around 3am and ended ard 5pm?
its realli omg can! butt hurts!
aftermaths milo left, and the rest of us went of dinner.
wanted to catch the hulk.. but i guess most of us haven slp for more then 24hr..
so gave it a miss and boi need to buy food for his mom.
sooo back at boi's hus and rest! KO the moment i was on the bed.
and slp thru till 3pm... goodness... butt hurt after the long hours of mj-ing.
i think i won 50cents? lolx

anyway.... went home after 4pm... and im out of the hus at 630pm!
went party world with hua and laoeh..
boi and xf joined us after work..
ended at 12, and im home now...

turning in for the nite...

PS: i know boi wont see this la.. but nevermind.. =)
thanks boi for the diamond ring, 1st one in my life.. <3
thanks to hua, lance n xf for the o.d.m watch.. =)
to milo also, thanks for the pink sotong, its ok if u cant find purple sotong. lolx!
and also for the upcoming birthday present..
ohya! jiewei, ada, bb~ for the big canon can i don accept the present? abit scary u knw?
5ppl drinkin one bottle of big canon!!!!!! or arbo i just bring the canon home and keep. its impossible to finish it la!!!!!!
thanks to kristy, joan, jovan, dardar, ganma, ganpa and weilun for the present.. haven had the time to meet up and collect it. but its okae.. =)
thanks to everyone whom made an effort to rem my birthday...
hai ni men po fei le... ^^

meiping || 12:46 AM

Date : Sunday, June 15, 2008
alright~ shit, im disappointed in james frey book.
his new book kinda of give me the feeling of after reading the first 3 page i wont want read anymore. =x
oh! i saw nic sparks havin a new book, "The Choice"
but i couldnt find it, the store helper said it was sold out.. =(
nvm i wil get it another day...

i almost almost almost paid money for mars vs venus,
but i didnt, cause i still have another 2 book abt the same title mars vs venus
but i didn complete it. =x


家的定义是什么?
什么是家?

turnin in for the nite...
kinda of early, but tml has got lots of thing to do... need the enegry.. =)
hopefully tml will be a happy small bbq gathering..
and i hope dear wont make me have black face, that i knw comfirm wil result to quarreling...

meiping || 12:44 AM

Date : Saturday, June 14, 2008
hmmm.. adding a couple more of books to my messy floor i guess..
i dont have a drawer or wadever shit in my room,
hence all my books are thrown onto the floor....
the same goes for my clothes, folding and stacking on chairs..
okok, i do have a bed and table...

anyway, was reading thru some review, and

A Thousand Splendid Sun and The Kite Runner
both by Khaled Hosseini seem pretty good. =)
and also
Twilight by stephenie meyer
and also
Devil May Care by Sebastian Faulks
and also

James Frey seems to have a new book too.
might be popping by bugis's kinokuniya .tml for the books, or should i go orchard's borders?
hmmmmmm

new collection on the way baby~

hmmm.. i kinda of miss aussis.. ><
sitting at the cafe by the sea, enjoying the wind and do my reading...
its so relaxing.. =)
but sad to say, in sg, i dont think there is such nice place?
sentosa is far too noisy and exp,
let alone east coast nor west coast.
sg is so so so.......

meiping || 12:54 AM

Date : Thursday, June 12, 2008
when then my birthday wish will come true?
when? asap can?
chinese always have a saying, u can have 3 birthday wish right?
this yr all my 3 bday wish will be the same...
health and safety to my family and friends....
most importantly my dad........
=(
im so =( today.... very...................
i can picture myself sobbing in tears to sleep tonight....
i need a shoulder to dry my tears tonight...
i dont wish to be alone in night like this..
i know i cannot accept and face it..
and i know i cannot face it alone, even tot dear is there in moral support...
tonight what i need will be physical support.....

please let me recieve good news the next time i answer bro phone....
please tell me that dad will be fine.....
please tell me that dad will recover...
please, i beg...........................................

=( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =(

but i will be strong...


我会坚强的。。。

meiping || 10:11 PM

Date : Tuesday, June 10, 2008
GREAT! *CLAPS* ANOTHER FAMILY WAR WITH MY FOSTHER MOTHER!
NICE ONE! STEPPING ON MY TAILS AGAIN AND AGAIN!
ONE MORE TIME OF THESE SHIT IM MOVING OUT AGAIN FOR SURE.
AND THIS TIME I WONT BE GOING BACK ANYMORE!

SO WHAT IF MY BIRTHCERT HAVE UR NAME?
IT JUST A TITLE TO ME. U WANT MY RESPECT EARN IT.
BUT SAD TO SAY U NEVER DID EARN MY RESPECT BEFORE.
NO MATTER YESTERDAY, TODAY, OR TOMMOROW.
YOU CAN NEVER HAVE MY RESPECT! NEVER EVER!
DONT COME TELLING ME THIS N THAT.
WHAT SHE BROUGHT U UP ALL THESE YEARS, COOK FOR YOU, WASH FOR YOU.
TOTAL SHIT K!
ENOUGH IS ENOUGH, THERE IS A LIMIT TO EVERYTHING.
ONCE U REACH MY LIMIT, THATS IT.

MOTHERFUCKER FUCK IT!
PHUA CHEE BYE
CHAO CHEE BYE
NINAMA
~!#$%^&*()_+

meiping || 1:47 AM

Date : Tuesday, June 03, 2008
im back from malaysia.
made a trip back on last fri, came back on mon.
am starting sch tml.

sometime it is nice just to stay at home doing nothing.
stock up lots of cup noodles, bring a mini reg into the room.
hot water boiler.
lock up the door and stay in the room... =)

meiping || 11:25 PM

Date : Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Is it possible to have a early bday wish? =)
i wish , i wish, i wish... good health for everyone around me....
i pray to my lord for everyone's health and safety...

the new was so suddenly. so shocking.
the moment i recieve the call, i totally went blank...
speechless..........................
anyway.......
i wish my dad with be in the pink of health...
i fear the news of losting him..
i fear picturing him lying in hosptial bed..
i fear the life without him..
i fear the days knowing that he has change..
i know i cannot live without him..

the worst fear in my life is losing any of my close ones.

just one plain simple wish.....
i would give everything up just for the wish to come true..
am serious about it. anything.... really... anything....

The Father always says, believe in him, and he will be there for you...
i always believe in him...
Therefore, i hope Lord has heard my prayers..
May The Lord Be With Me.... =)

PS : xiaogua is so sweet can.. hearts him lots... i love you too.. =)
i promise to buy lots of toys and bring u all go gaigai when im back . =D

meiping || 10:02 PM

Date : Monday, May 26, 2008
did lots of stuff the past one month..
sentosa outing(s) both dae n nite..
prawn-ing
badmintion
drinking
supper
movie
singing
pubbing
buffet
chalet
majong
slacking....
im sure there is more, but at the moments onli these comes into mind..
back with my old co.
drinkin sessions.. =)
first time winning in majong session too.
seems like alot of first time ya..
anyway spread everything out, did everything with different group of people.
and suddenly i am missing my family.. very much.... missing them...
i guess i will do a short and fast trip back to malaysia soon... =)

sat had claypot rice at tpy lor4 with his family too.
sun had buffet at orchard hotel with boi and his family. his dad's bdae..
tts all i can remember...

and for one moment, just now.. not now...
suddenly emo.. didn want be home so early...
had a sit at my hus area playground for like an hour and more...
untill my phone rings for me to be home....

at the moment a tot went thru my mind...
will there be really such thing call friends forever?
or at least till death bed...
am turning 20 this coming june... and i found out that, actually there have been alot changes..
for example friends, used to have such a nice big group of sista.. than slowly, gone...
than working friends... slowly losting contact... childhood friend... slowly fading out...
online friends... slowly not contact anymore... so many people has been in and out of my life..
hence i wonder, who gonna be the longest...
thats gonna be a big question mark for me.. =)
anyway i really wish tingy to be back ya...
to be there sitting by me... listening.
to be there, just there to make sure im okay..
to be there, just sitting there keeping quiet for the whole day.. knowing that each of us is there..

tml will be.. okie to be extact its already 12:55 so today
is our 2nd yr ann... so much thing has been during the past 2 yr..
wadever wil be wil be, wadever will nt be will nv be..
lets the wind guide us by... and stop when its right....

would like to thank a special someone. =)
lots of thanks to you, for standin by me the past 2yr ++ =)
please conutine to so, as a friend.. my selfish request..
=)

im turning in for the day.... nites people...
hearts everyone thats in my life....

meiping || 12:27 AM

Date : Friday, May 09, 2008
拥有一个会让你痛苦的人,最好是放弃。。。
因为放弃将会带给你一万个不同的幸福。。。
=)

meiping || 6:19 PM

Date : Monday, April 28, 2008
Muhaha! updates right? here it is! =D
enough hurhur~
tsk tsk~

Dry your eyes, clear your mind, you just gotta take it one day at a time. Dust off your heart, take it off the shelf, you gotta remember to love yourself

I'm not sure,
but I think it's becoming more than I can take,
but I'm still tryingto be brave about this.


she looked back on her life and realized everything that happened had only made her that much stronger.


people always say be yourself;
but how can you do that if you
dont even know who you are?

A best friend is there when you have nothing
& more importantly when you feel like nothing.


be strong now,
because things will get better.
it might be stormy now,
but it can't rain forever.


on the bright side,
a horrible tragedy really shows
who your true friends are.


Tears are unspoken words that the heart can't bare to say!


A best friend like a sister that destiny forgot to give you.


"The most important thing in life is to stop saying 'I wish' and start saying 'I will'.


she swears theres nothing wrong but i hear her playing the same old song.


She stopped at every single set of traffic lights she met, and all she wanted to do was go home and throw a tantrum in the privacy of her own home.


Music does something that is indescribable
but able to be felt deep inside you.


We spend our whole lives telling ourselves
that everything happens for a reason.
When in reality,
it's just that we give reasons
for everything that happens.


And after a while,
You learn that you don't need anyone else in order to survive.
No one is ever going to always be there,
No matter what they say or what they promise you.
You just have to suck it up,
and accept it.


I just don't understand how You can smile with all those tears in your eyes Tell me everything is wonderful now.


She just smiles because she knows the world will never really understand her, but she doesn't mind; it doesn't matter. She's happy anyway.


its funny how one group of people can change your life forever.
in this world,
people are going to say
don’t do this,
don’t do this,
don’t do this.
You know what you’re going to end up with?
Nothing to do.


She has everything and more,
yet she still breaks down in tears at night.
I guess there really is more than meets the eye.


Most of the time we cant tell whats wrong with
Somebody by just looking at them.
After all, they
Can look perfectly fine on the outside while their
Insides tell us a different story.


Love hurts. Boys lie. Friends cry. People die. Parents yell. You always try. You're never good enough, And you don't know why.

meiping || 1:37 PM

Date : Monday, April 21, 2008
欢乐通宵~!

meiping || 2:36 PM

Date : Saturday, April 19, 2008
i guess i gonna give up blogging very soon..
sooo mean time cares ppls...

meiping || 9:53 PM

Date : Tuesday, April 15, 2008
arhh~ 我们家的milo让我想起了tingy jiejie~ <3
ever since tingy jie left le never really recieve this kind of small small hand make thing le.. =D
*happy*
hor bb and mei~ miss tingy hor~ ~><~

meiping || 10:12 AM

Date : Monday, April 14, 2008
Please treasure and cherish what you have.. nOt hurtIng her n others even urself.. Its not easy to have what u got now..i think she's really a very nice gal.. and i can feel that actually u still loves her alot.. u with her is nt bcos of responsiblity but u love her and she's part of your life.. although i hate to have this as our ending but i think this will do good for nt just me and u but also her.. i hope i have make the right choice.. more or less of cos i'll still miss you.. but i rather keep all this feeling deep in my heart.. so i hope u too will keep me deep in ur heart and never tries to take it out again.. If one day, we ever see each other pls just pretend that we are just stanger to one another.. Just do this small little request i have.. Thanks..

- bitch - ^^

meiping || 9:43 PM

Date : Sunday, April 13, 2008
argh~ 好不顺心~!
er jie hasn't been home for more than a week... no news... nothing... zzzz
i ponder am i the oldest in the family? or am i the youngest.
goodness la...
er jie gone - faults me.. ><
fk up! fk it!

moving on is easy -- it's what we leave behind that's hard

- 当眼泪流下来,才知道,分开也是另一种明白.

- 脸上的快乐,别人看得到。心里的痛又有谁能感觉到.  

- 分手后不可以做朋友,因为彼此伤害过.不可以做敌人.因为彼此深爱过,所以我们变成了最熟悉的陌生人.

- 有时,爱也是种伤害.残忍的人,选择伤害别人,善良的人,选择伤害自己

- 如果,不幸福,如果,不快乐,那就放手吧;如果,舍不得、放不下,那就痛苦吧

meiping || 11:03 PM

Date : Thursday, April 10, 2008
wo men jia de milo angry mp le.. =/
one after another....
i just really hope tt i wont make her mom thinks tt im a bad influces to her..
whenever goes out with mp come home so late all these.. ><
thats why i didn wan meet her for dinner...
i knw if i meet, she will come all the way from sk, which is like so far...
she has been going out late almost everyday. and tml we going out again...
might go home late again... -.-!

maybe my ways of doing thing for friends isnt wad milo likes ba...
i knw milo reads, just wanna say i wont be like monkie whom only calls u when i need u.
and throw u aside when i dont need u...
i said my piece....
sorry milo if i let u felt wads monkie had let u felt..
i didnt means thing to goes this way..
its ur choice nt reply me.. wont force u.....




its gonna be my first time and last time doing such thing for the relationship.
i wish, my feeling and habit would die off fast..................................

meiping || 11:27 PM

Date : Wednesday, April 09, 2008
nice quotes............

& as you look back on all the memories,
it makes you start to cry.
You realize you may never see these people again

Best friends hang TOUGH.
they don't come with fragile stickers and aren't easily scared off,
or ticked off.
best friends help you out WHENEVER they can,
and make time for you even when they don't have any.
Best friends are cross-your-heartand hope-to-die,
good-times-and-BAD-TIMES,borrow-anything,
tell-you-everything,trust-you-with-their DEEPEST-DARKEST-SECRETS,
always & FOREVER.

When no ones around to see her pain,
she breaksdown.
They say she's so strong,
but they've never seen her cry.
She's got everyone fooled.

I think everybody needs a place to go when things become too much,
a place where the world is the way you want it to be,
& if you had a choice,
it's how you would have created.

Leaving her standing
Alone in the dust
Crying her eyes outBroken her trust
Bickering and fighting
Swarmed in the crowd
Trying to scream
Silent but loud

I’ve learned a lot these past few years through my fake smiles & unseen tears that friends sometimes are not forever & true love does not always last.

It's amazing how you can keep so much bottled up inside of you and walk around and no one has any idea.

I just realized I don't even know who I am;
I don't even know why I'm here.
All my life I've been treated like a caged bird.
Everyone tells me what to do,
what I should act like,
what I should look like,
until I don't even know what I want,
how I want to act,
or what I should look like.
All my life I've gotten pushed down by everyone around me,
but what did I do to deserve it?

=) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =)

nights all.

meiping || 9:37 PM

Date : Tuesday, April 08, 2008
我是着世界上最笨的女孩!!

本小姐认第一,没人能认第二!!

一次的错误决定.... 害了我自己...
我真聪明.. =)

我的心理很不好受。。你知道吗?
我的付出你一点都看不到。
我很努力了,可是你的心却是盲目的。
可是有些事情你在瞒着我~
不如你的告诉我你心里真正要的是什么?

Everything must come under control, its getting out of hand, out of our limit....
its hard for me to stop depending of you... i dont deny that..
But with so much bad memories will we be able to survive thru it?

meiping || 11:20 PM

Date :
could someone kind enough care to teach me hw am i suppose to put it down?
in someway or some form.
its unbearable this way.
and i guess i will break down anytime, any moment, any place............
i don't like this kind of feeling....
it's so suckyyyyyyyyyyyy.

=(

meiping || 12:15 AM

Date : Sunday, April 06, 2008
结束了吗? 真的结束了吗?
其实, 我一直在努力了.
努力成为你想要的女孩.
可是.. 没有人是完美的..
对不起.

meiping || 11:05 PM

Date : Saturday, April 05, 2008
其实你真正了解我多少?
对你来说,我永远都是那个不讲里的.
你说我很难猜测,有那末难吗?
其实那天你生日我根本不想出席....
因为我有没有去都是一样的.
就如以前一样,我会被...........遗忘........
你知道吗,那天我的心情真的很不好.....
家里出了事,可是我还是要带着微笑面对你和你的朋友......
你知到是多难受的吗?
对你来说你生日你最大, 你的生日最重要.
好累... =)
我好想离开你着个坏习惯.
我好想戒掉............ 好让我不用明明两个人,却一人哭泣....
要如何才能把你戒了.........

一波为停,一波又起.....

永远都要我担心吗?
永远都要我操心吗?
永远都要我心痛吗?
永远都要我哭泣吗?
到底要我怎么办?

是你们让我一次又一次的放弃了前途,放弃了留学的机会..
因为我放心不下你们...
到底要我放弃多少? 要我失去多少?

明明绿灯转眼变成红灯,假使相当勇敢怎可挽回自身,若要冲损伤怎可以不留痕.

我没事了... 舒服多了...
=)

谢谢桦桦,贝壳,雪芬和玲玲的陪伴. ^^
有朋友真好,有真心诚意对带对方的朋友更好!

meiping || 6:10 PM

Date : Wednesday, March 19, 2008
曾有过个傻瓜在我的生命留下了他的脚印,牢牢的印在心里。
他在我最需要的时候一直守候着,陪着我。
和他谈话时很开心。 =)
但发生了一些事。 他不在是我的傻瓜了。
心里对他真的有很深的亏欠。
但不知道要如何对他说‘对不起’

今天傻瓜问了我一个很难但很简单的问题。
‘你还爱他吗?’
哈哈!
我当场傻去了,我没有答案,我也不知道要如何回答。

我也不敢期待太多,也不敢想将多。。。

我不开心。。。 =)

meiping || 9:38 PM

Date : Thursday, March 13, 2008
once again im back from malaysia.
my real dad is down for tibi.
so had to rush back. simliar illness to ahgong. -.-!
smk n smk drink n drink. -.-!
now the whole family have to go for injection and checkup.
hopfully i was fine. =) but..... for some reason i had to do a full checkup.
no idea for wad, coz the nurse n doc was talkin in malay. how would i knw wad they were talking!
anyway, i got my result. pass 2 fail 2. gotta to resit for it..
history for toursim -.-! its worst than secondary school history........
arh!

left ankle hurts.. i think is feng shi ping le ba? =x
im old already~ ><
i have tons of pictures. but fail to upload it.. ~><~
dono wads wrong also....
sians.....

meiping || 9:49 PM

Date : Friday, February 29, 2008
=)
it has been a busy month i guess. hence for the lack of updates.
spent 3weeks plus in malaysia ( during chinese new yr time )
after tt back on the 12th of feb.
in between so many days i couldn't rem wad has happened also.
but anyway, i dont think this is a good year for me.
although had a great cny back in malaysia.
however jus right after cny, back in sg.
within weeks. recieve news of my dad in hosptial. -.-
quarrels , disagreement, worries, emo.
how great can tt be...

school result isn't out yet.. wonder when..
went for interview no result too..
boring.. -.-!

anyway, recently there has been a qns been asked very often.
bf ? gf? -.-
its just a title.. is tt so important?
i really dont wish to answer anymore.
must everything be defined very clearly?
at least to me, nope...
i knw it inside my heart thats is what it matter the most.

btw, i going back malaysia later at 3.30pm.
yes, again....

there has been lots of pictures n videos.
upload when im free ba..

with love,
meiping

meiping || 6:53 AM

Date : Friday, January 18, 2008

















alright, i got a new mp4. samung yp-t10, 8g memory. $349. ^^

i spent $50 on facial thing. bought a couple new top n btm..

i need a new bag and shoe.. >.<

anyway i going back malaysia on this sat at 1530. ^^

which mean this blog will be left untouch for a couple of weeks..

advance hapi chi new yr to all~



meiping || 4:40 AM

Date : Saturday, January 12, 2008
went malaysia yst with xf and anto again..
walk and walk n walk.
im so shag out..
well...
todae met xf n anto had dinner.
and shopped ard..
went amk aftermath..
and my hus area for supper.
and im home now..
im so bored..
i would like to finish my puzzle..
but im so out of mood to do it..
so i went to pack my room..
and i found alots of stuff lying around at the side..
boxes and boxes of stuff..
so i packed it...
2 boxes gonna go to the bin..
all my N and O lvls books..
another box i found my kids pictures..
scanned some.. and blog it..
outside ahgong old hus.











cant rem the age, bt i knw this is after i left my family.
coz foster mom cut short my hair.















hmmm.. a few mths old..











short hair. -.- same after foster mom took me.
at ahgong hus.










same outside ahgong hus.











ahgong hus de living room















me with er jie











me with er jie again











my hometown area.










done.. jus a couple. the rest of the photos has gone missing..
either lost or tore away by me. =)

anyway, i also found alot of necklace. -.-
alot alot wors.. all new de.. some are even still wrapped nicely.
is it time for me to change the necklace?
>< no idea...
off i go for my bathe..

one word - trouble. =)

meiping || 12:39 AM

Date : Monday, January 07, 2008
i couldn slp..
i feel so emo..
so sick...
guess due to tt my AV coming.. boring...
sucky........

emo emo emo~

anyway, newyr eve went out with hua n xf..
met cine.. had dinner..
than we slacked..
xf and hua pooled..
3am went partyworld.
6am went breakfast with anto.
than back to anto hus.. and slp..

than i couldn rem wad happened...
thurdae went malaysia with xf n anto..
shop walk eat shop walk eat shop walk eat
just like tt nor..

yst movie with milo hua n xf..
alvin n chipmunks. 2nd time watching it.. nice~ ^^

sians. i haven been going for hosp check up.
missed another appointment. craps.
nites

meiping || 4:01 AM

bored
Date : Sunday, December 30, 2007
ever since i finish my studies..
so boring...
i wish i was from some kind of rich family..
and all i have to do is to ask my dad for money and study and study..
just study and nothing else.. so nice..
aiya.. why day dream so much.. -.-
pointless.

alright, 2007 is coming to an end soon..
with a flash of light, 1yr gonna past by soon..
so sian... =x

argh..........................................................
like very fan! but dono fan wad....................................................................

meiping || 11:31 PM

Date : Friday, December 28, 2007
alright, xmas is over...
i spent my xmas at coffeeshop havin supper with xf. we didn even knw it was already 12 until we decided to go hm.
lolx

anyway... nt much present.. hahas
keychain from classmate,
necklaces from anto,
hp beanbag from hua,
limited ed vodka from daddy,
rasberry vodka from jiejie
and
another vodka from mei.
tts all.. alot vodka. -.-
are u ppl encouraging me to drink? 0.0 hahas
JK

anyway, my milo went oversea~ woots!
hopes she enjoy herself! ^^

studies haven been going smooth for me.
relationship too...
family is need nt to say de la..

btw, i forgot wad i did the past few dae.. shall nt blog abt it.
STM! ^^ am proud to admit?! LOL

k. as for todae..
woke up ard 8 fell back to slp till 10.
prepare and out i go..
decided to bring my hi-fi set back to MY.
since im not using it at ALL.
bought for 299 and use it less than 3mth...
rather let it rot, why not bring back give korkor use. keke
sooo soo soo after breakfast+lunch with anto,
cab down to woodland checkpoint there.
it cost me $15.10!
saw lance at there, shocked! -.-
went JB, help laopa take, coz kinda of heavy la..
nua at laoma place till 5pm.
met dajie, went out to sg, jalan jalan abit.
than they left for work, hence i cab down to J8..
this time round lagi worst la. $21.60.......................
speechless......... my spending for the dae all went to cab! >had dinner and home bitter home.
jus started the puzzle....

PS - leg blister hurts alot... ~>.<~

meiping || 10:27 PM

Date : Wednesday, December 19, 2007
just finish my FnB paper..
tml will be accounting paper..
totally shagness once again..

i miss hugging my fav book at the cafe with my fav drink.

The Past
When I think how life used to be, always walking in the shadows, then I look at what you’ve given me… I feel like dancing on my tiptoes; I must say, everyday I wake and realize you’re by my side. I know Im truly blessed for everything you’ve given me, blessed for the tendernes you show. Do my best with every breath thats in me, blessed to make sure you never

The Present
I think I noticed when things started to change...
the hugs were quicker, the phone calls shorter, and they weren't every night.
We didn't hurry to the place we said we would meet.
The "I love you's" felt more like a forced routine and really had no meaning.
When we saw eachother, the smiles werent as bright or as big.
Our thoughts weren't only of eachother.
We seemed uninterested.
We felt unloved.
We had too many doubts

hahas.

meiping || 1:30 AM

Date : Monday, December 17, 2007
exam has come.. knocksknocks on my doors.
big boo~
yst was total shagness!
whahas!
i woke up at 11am on sat, and didn slp until sundae nite!
shiok~ lolx!
dam seehhhh la.. -.-
anyway, dam blur la. i dono why..
i didnt check the timetable again, coz there was updates on it!
OMFG LA! ><
coz old time table says exam on monday 10 - 1.
so i tot didnt change.. buttttt
actually they changed to to 2-5! omg can!
><><><
dam wad la.

anyway..................
i was thinking of studying till dip and stop..
but.. now, wonder i should stay futher..
but it will cost ard 28k. WOO! 28k nor.
hw am i gonna save la. wtf..
so wondering IF! i really want study, should i take a loan from dad 1st?
sian leh... feel like studying all the way, all my life and not work.. =x
everyday just sch and sch and sch.. gd right!
lolx

i am feeling so sleepy right now..
*yawns*

meiping || 12:17 PM

Date : Monday, December 10, 2007
eh. i change a new blogskin already..
and i also change a new tagbox. tot it is still cbox.
i dono wads wrong.. sumthing is wrong.. -.- i always cant see my own tagboard.
and tt dae when i edit skin, worst! i cant even see a thing..
so.... SUA! change new de..
xin de kai shi~ ^^
lolx
lame!

anyway, exam is coming le~ argh~ coming coming~
fast fast come come~ fast fast end end~

afternoon sis sms me.. say....
hometown kena flood!
flood again! last yr i kena trap in MY for a mth due to the flood.
heng this yr gt exam nv go back.. arbo kena trap in MY due to flood.
xin ku ni le sis~ lolx
phew~ no need do the moving of stuffs and washing of hus after the flood!
whahas!
=x

and btw i finally got to donuts, craving craving~ hee
nice nice~

meiping || 8:55 PM

Date : Friday, December 07, 2007
okay. i am just complaining abt the last post.
not that i regret being in the family or the need to handle the problem.
aiya. its like just complaining, letting out some stress nia~ no worries k.

its ur choice, your life, your family and ur sons.
i cant do anything but to listen.. and keep quiet..
when thing goes wrong.. im the 1st to kena..
it always been like tt. from young to big..
from dono anything to knowing all the truth..
from being so carefree to carrying all the problem..
from nothing to everything..
sometime i dono if i have done the right thing. chose the right way.
one side i have to protect sis, another side i need to tell the truth.
sis trust me so much.. told me everything..
the same goes for mummy n korkor.
they all trust me so much. hoping i can help sis.
but another side, sis doesnt want any help..
she made her choice, she is leaving for good. tts wad she said.
she want to leave le, but she doesnt want mummy they all to knw where she is going.
but she will tell me, keep in contact with me..
no matter how much i said, she doesnt takes in any words.
she is still leaving..
leaving doesnt slove anything.................................
it creates more problem...........................................
aiya.. i really dono la..
wads with the family man.
everything is so fk up!
maybe i should be happy i have been bought to sg.
or maybe i shouldnt....
they ask me this n tt? expected a gd answer from me..
but whom am i to ask to get the answer?
life is never fair, nth in life is fair..

wo yi jing mei you lei shui zai rang wo ku qi le..
jiu xiang gan ku de jin..
zai ye mei you shui le..

meiping || 9:00 PM

Date : Wednesday, December 05, 2007
everything have been the same..
stress.
i doubt i wil be able to carry on this burden la..
big fuck meh.. think i god? or wad?
everyday call and call..
in school also call..
as if i can do sumting to change the thing happening..
wtf it!
~!@#%*(_+
BYE

meiping || 8:55 PM

Date : Saturday, November 24, 2007
ARH! im so stress!
so stress wor~ >.<
stress stress stress~
ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
STRESS LA! FK!
BYE!

meiping || 11:10 PM

Date : Tuesday, November 20, 2007
hey! knw wad i found out tt my blog is like sooooooooooo emo can!
anyway! troubles... always alot of trouble wtf is abt my life la. GDI (goddamit) =x
okok i having lots of reports, assignment in hand. rushing it thru it.. ><
26th it the deadline. which is also my death dae! whahas!

okay! family sucks! im like a hotline for them.
have prob they call. bo taiji. bo call de. wtf la! argh!
end here~

<3 shagua

meiping || 1:33 AM

Random Stuffs
Date : Thursday, November 15, 2007
well, been pondering.. for quite awhile.. about my future..
what i want, and what im gonna do..
and.. i stil doesn't have an answer yet...
such high expectation on me from my family...
hoping that i would study as much as i can.
find a job that offer me a high pay, in such tt i will be able to support the family..
but.. i don want... i just want a carefree life of my own...
the simpler the better..
i just want a simple life.. and in fact, the simpler life u want, the harder it wil be able to archieve it.. why is it so?
the family wants me to works, wants me to study..
daddy wants me to be able to take over his breadwinner position after he retired from work..
am i able to do so? am i able to carry the family like how well he is doing now?
i doubt i have such strenght and enegry to do so.
or do i have so much time to do so..
i know i have always been complain alot... to my blog, and blog reader...
but... i dono wad else to do than to complain and keep quiet at home..
sometime i feel tt i don belong to any place.. nor do i fits into any place..

u knw, i feel tt my life is like already being planned before i was born..
planned, so well planned, with so many loopholes.
many people might think that im so blissed..
on the outside... maybe yes, i might look blissed with such a family..
but what happens inside is so pain in the ass.
u get contorl, u cant do this u cant do tt.
but u must do this u must do that!
yaya, don come telling me its for ur own good.
im sick of hearing tt! doing this is ur own good. or tt!
when me myself in my own shoe don feel good at all!
oh crap! im fucking sick and tired of this kind of life!
seriously im!
know wad, i hope im a kid, skinned knee cap is so much than skinned soul.

sometime i wish, reali wish, if i can exchange for a different life..
how good will that be..
i would give up everything for it...
but i knw it jus my wishful thinking..
hahas.
alright la. after letting it out.. i feel so much better

meiping || 10:27 PM

Date : Tuesday, November 13, 2007
人生是一段往前行的路程 一站接着一站
每个过程都有令人难忘的点滴
有欢笑 也有悲伤
一点一滴瓦成一段段的回忆
错过了就无法在回头 失去了也无法找回
有所计划 有个目标 有法找回
有所計划  有個目標  有片願景
让生活每天都過的精采  有所收获
你的故事  從今天開始!


每個人都找寻一種幸福
幸福的定义不同  幸福也有很多种形式
但人们往往要的  卻是一种得不到的
是一种想像  是一种渴望  還是一种感覺?
但似乎怎麼努力  幸福好像越離越遠
越想拥有  反卻失落更多
原來  幸福就在你週围
只是你從來不去注意
直到有一天  它走了  它不见了
你才明白它在你心中多么的重要


有些事  想忘记  又偏偏想起
也有令人回忆的往事  卻一點也沒有絲緒
人生來來去去  很多事早在不經意间失落
也有很多事隨著时间的洪流  一點一滴逝去
也許太在乎  反而思緒越亂  越無法掌握
回憶是對過去的一种想念
走必留下痕跡  也不用太过在意
也許有一天  又會真實的浮現在腦海中
那年曾经..


传說中  每個人都有一颗守护星
當你抬起头  满天繁點群星
是你在暸望星空?  
或是星星对眼和你相看?
距離多么遙不可及  时光那么久不能逝
若心有靈犀  你可深切體會
那颗星  原來就在不遠處
原來  就在你心中
靜靜守候你千百萬年


我沒有千金萬貫的家財
也沒有字字動人的情書
更沒有情意绵绵的話語
我沒有什么好的  可以给你
只有我的一颗真心
但請你小心奕奕 因为  你步步踩的  都是我的夢

上面的那些寫作好美。。真的很美。
我很喜欢! ^^ 谢谢傻瓜~

meiping || 11:58 PM

Date : Thursday, November 08, 2007
alright. i haven slp a wink, ohya i did. i mean i only slept for 30mins.. -.-
dam shag...
last night conf and conf.. conf until werid stuffs..
end up 430AM, than hang up..
6plus school.. ( prepare + breakfast + wait for ling )
omg stil late for sch.. wadever..
after sch went to fetch xf..
went back bishan tgt.. jalan jalan abit..
thann 4 plus went to catch ' the game plan' with michelle and huahua..
ohh.. nice and funny show.. ^^
had dinner... walk ard j8 again...
*j8 is so boring*

after michelle n huaa went off.
waited for xf to knock off..
accompany her for dinner..
and ALAS im home..

btw i wil be gg back malaysia this coming friday for granny's bday..
shall be back on sunday i guess?
hopefully ba..

PS - my blister is soooooo painfulllllllllllllllllllll

meiping || 1:38 AM

Date : Saturday, November 03, 2007
was hm the whole of yst night..
friday morning met xf went library..
aftermath went back rest.
night time met up with michelle, huahua and ck...
huahua organised a special outing..
went to the Mind Cafe, its near PS. first time there..
damn! speechless man.. lols
guess it was supposed to be more fun..
but guess four of us nt tt close or open to each yet? lols.
lot of holdback i guess.

after the cafe, all went hm.
while i went to Partyworld to find anto..
actually is just meet him for awhile than go off de.
BUT BUT BUT.. end up waited for around 4 hr for him to knock off... ><
after he knock off went back to slp..

saturday afternoon pei anto go to his frens baby de one month..
new born baby is soo cute..
aftermath......
went to pick dawson up and meet with xf...
godness... dawson is sooooooooooo.........
no comments...
lucky alfred came to pick him up..
went J8...
than to my hus area for some snacks...
and..... im home nw....

meiping || 10:19 PM

Date : Thursday, November 01, 2007
记得有人曾经说过‘人在江湖,身不由己’
那我呢? 难道我会是‘人在家庭,身不由己’
这几年下来,我似乎渐渐地发现到我的包袱似乎越来越重了, 也迷惘了自己。
家庭,学业,金钱,爱情,友情等等,越来越沉重,重得我快不能呼吸了。
有时候我真的感到很无助,根本不知道要如何是好。
就只可以带上微笑的面具,假装什么也没有发生,装出一副很强的样子。
可是在强的人总有一天也会垮,也会倒下的。
我不强,我也不要做强的人。我一点也不强。。
我只希望我可以放下这沉重的包袱,坐下来好好的休息。
休息是为了走更远的路。。。
那怕只有那一分钟也好!
我真的感到很疲惫了。。。
有时候真希望有一双肩膀可以靠一靠,帮我挡风遮雨。
我累了,真的真的累了。
好想好想什么事也不管了。。。。。。。。。。。。。

meiping || 9:16 PM

Date :
i wish there was someting... really something that i can do now..
than to stare at my hp waiting for calls and sms..
argh.. its so painful, when u wish u can do something for them..
but u cant..
really jus something i wish i can do!

i really don understand...
why do thing always end up coming to me..
when they knw there is nothing much i can do..
but only to add stress and burden to me only..
i feel so helpless...
hao wu zhu..

i don lik this feeling....

meiping || 12:16 AM

Date : Saturday, October 27, 2007
im stil down with flu n sore throat! >.sad case~
nth much todae. breakfast as usual.
sch as usual. meet dar~ after so mani donkey years.
hmmm. recently outside school gt alot NEA ppl..
saw 2 ppl got caught for throwing cigt butt..
after dar hab her tok with lucas, she decided to come back to sch.
aftermath cab down to FEP.
walked, bought sumting.
than walked again to Lilo. dar wan buy lunch for her bf.
followed by a walk to HMV. my toes hurts badly...
i wish i can chop of my toes >.<
anyway! after 'touring' HMV walk all the way back to Lilo.
and ALAS! went PS~
arghh~ donuts donuts~ even tot donut factory donut is nicer.
but missdonut aint tt bad too! ^^ bought a dozen home!
keke

met xf for supper ard 1o3opm..
and im all shag out...

Karma what goes around comes around..

meiping || 2:06 AM

Date : Saturday, October 20, 2007
alright. great. im down with a bad sore throat AGAIN.. -.-!
every month without fail.. like my menses de. =x
went to see doc a couple day ago..
got myself 2day mc..
monday didn go sch.. tue n wed MC. thur no sch.
this week onli went sch for one day. which is today.
sad la.. ling going to defer her module le.
after si come ling. -.- sibei sian de leh..
all say hao study tgt grad tgt de mah.. kns!
nw everyday go sch alone le.. eeee~ sucky~
alone = cab = ex = bankupt

was late for lesson day.. booo! 1oam to 5pm todae.. boring..
thru out my whole dae was msg-ing... from full batt to low batt..
tt onli happen during secondary sch if nt wrong. lolx.
so long dont have this kind of feeling le..
anyway.. was feeling unwell -.- halfway thru 2nd part of the lesson..
communition.. yucks.. boring....................................
after sch wanted to cab home... but no cab....
hab to take bus all the way back to bishan! DAMN!
went j8 to find xf.. than meet boi..
had dinner.... home sweet home..

To Be or Not To Be... Thats A Question....

meiping || 12:47 AM

Date : Tuesday, October 09, 2007
blogger sucks big time!
i couldnt log in sometime!
when i wan blog, i couldnt log in at all..
wtf! something wrong with my lappy meh.. zzz
anyway, exam ended, holiday also ended..



i gt a new hp SE K810i. only pay $28! =x
i wanted SE W580 de.. but! no stock.
and starhub is damn fuck up can.
went PS, they said PS no stock, onli Vivo have..
so went Vivo, but, Vivo also NO STOCK!
somemore Vivo already no stock for almost a month le!
wad kind of service and information is that sia..
waste my time n money...
theres no w580, so i hab to settle down with another phone..
so thats hw i gt my SE k810i.

w580i




















K81oi

meiping || 3:12 AM

Date : Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Okie.. 3 paper down~ 1 more to go!
wee! last one paper to go already...
>.<
cant wait for holidays to come man..
heard ppl saying holiday only last for a week..
so sucky~ one week is not enough..
oh crap.. holiday is nv enough k..
chomp chomp fast fast finish this course man~
want go work work work~
earn money~
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
LOL

oh crap! i miss those slacking time with dar..
so miss her la.. >.<
crap!
aiya.. she gt her own life, own grp of frens le. wad to do.

anyway.......... i dono wad to do with anto... -.-!

karma

god don bless me liao thanks.

meiping || 3:20 PM

Date : Thursday, September 13, 2007
okie. 2 paper down! 2 more paper to go!
dying soon le man! ARGH!
>.<

说了又不听,
听了又不懂,
不懂又不问,
问了又不做,
做了又做错,
错了又不认,
认了又不改,
改了又不服,
不服又不说 !

meiping || 10:57 PM

Date : Friday, September 07, 2007
alot of emotion running thru my mind and heart...
im just so speechless...
emo-ing

meiping || 1:44 AM

Date : Wednesday, August 29, 2007
i guess almost whole of sg have been pouring cats and dogs.
woke up in the moring for school, just as i was about to step of home.
it started raining! dam! wads a luck~ >.<
took for yu san.. met ling at j8, cab to sch..
lesson start at 9am, fancy us reaching at 11am..
and 30mins later class ended.. -_-! nice one..
aftermath went queensway shopping center.
had lunch. accompanied ling till she work.
cab back to boi's house. oh ya! while i was on the cab i saw tt some part of the road are flooded..
yea.. i reali mean FLOODED alright. its kinda of funni to see sg being flooded.. =x
took a nap at boi's home.. he went for his pract 5 n TTT while i was slping.
-_-!
werid feeling to be at his home with him not at home..
oh ya.. went hm ard 6pm.
had dinner... todae weather is so nice~ i wish i can slp..
but at cant.. still doing assignments.. lalalas.. always doing it at the eleventh hours.
and i guess im the clumbest and stupidest gal on the world.
i cut myself when opening the yu san! -_-!

sumthing i wish i could walk in the rain like the past.
i sort of hate raining days? coz it makes me emo! -_-!
reali emo, make my mind run wild.. make me feel like crying.. -_-
but another point of view is tt it makes sg cooler and nicer to slp.. hee..
i will be going back to malaysia alone on this fridae..
afternoon i guess. i still haven get the train ticket. hopefully still hab! *cross finger*
arh~ i miss my babies.. ^^

meiping || 1:04 AM

Date : Tuesday, August 28, 2007
I feel like I'm drifting away from all those people who matter the most
Forget me never, love me always, thats what we said
But I feel like we are losing each other, losing the faith
I once had in you
And that is the scariest thing ever

meiping || 1:22 AM

Date : Sunday, August 26, 2007
>.<
tired+slpy=pekcek!
blogging time, since im so free nw.
woke up at 1pm by boi. wash up and went out to meet boi at J8.
had lunch at Pasta mania. did i get it correct? o.0
wadever. anyway todae is our 15 month already..
1year3months already...
after lunch boi went for his bike pract, while i went home..
tts all nor.. boo~ boring!
still hab assignment to do.. i hate assignment can! seriously hate it la!

something, i realli have no idea why thing happen the way this way..
i have totally no contorl over it..
argh... i dono la.. i go le..

meiping || 4:14 PM

Date : Thursday, August 23, 2007
argh! i seriously hate assignments..
secondary school course work is so much easier to do..
assignments is making me sick la.. sick of doing assignment already.
already 2am le.. so is yst ba..
k yst hab lab lesson in the morning.
ling was late -_-!
lucky boi was there to accompany me to wait for her..
had breakfast, ling came...
took cab to school.. went for lab.. dam..
its so pointless to go for lab sumhow.
i think less than 20 people went for the lesson.
ITT project stil hab way done.. >.<>
still gt business and marketing to go. im dying already la.
~!#$%^&*()_+
after school cabbed back to bishan again... cab here cab there.. cab cab cab..
most of my pocket money goes to cab.. sucky feeling.. -_-!
head over to boi's hus. xf came over at 1pm. she used lappy while i slept..
had a slight asthma attack suddenly.. -_-!
think boi's hus too dusty and dirty le.. sigh.. when will he clean up his hus... so messy.. >.<>
5pm+ went out for dinner with xf, while boi head for his pract 2.
aftermath met up with jess and jerry at PS. hate being a light bulb! =x
boi came after his pract.. oh ya! saw the chip n dale necklace. so CUTE can!
i want buy~ i wan buy~ whaha!
jess n jerry went off 1st..
had supper with boi at kfc.. aftermath he sent me home..
been so long since he send me home le.. >.<

time flies.. this coming 26th aug is our 15th months le..
unbelieveble.. so mani thing had happen for the past 15th mth..
i dono the goods can cover the bads happening ma..

*confused*

meiping || 2:07 AM

Date : Monday, August 20, 2007
Yst was busy with my assignments, decided nt to blog..
anyway, boi went MIA yst.. -_- i hate it la. and he dont seems to bother..
fine.. nvm.. forget it, he is always like tt.
didnt go out for the whole dae for sun..
ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!
i am DAM DAM DAM SHAG OUT! >.<
was rushing thru my econs assignment yst till 4am.. >.<
end up slept only at 5am plus plus plus..
woke up at 8am.. and i was going to be late la! fckin dam it..
nevermind, late late late ba..
but hor, ling tt pig got totally knock out..
call her hus also nv answer de..
call and call and call.. -_-
almost gave up and go sch myself.. however, after i printed my assignment out she suprisingly woke up herself! gd..
meet her only at 930am, lesson start at 9am k.. -_-!
cab down... it was pouring so heavy..
reach school only at 1020am?
its total crap la.. end up the teacher say friday than pass up! fk!
made me rush thru it.. >.<
im dam tired la.. i think my brain cells are all dead already..
after sch, meet up with boi, he finally back in ACTION.
went TPY to meet lionel..
ling came, went for lunch, aftermath listen to sum toking? lolx.
went to look for xiaohan.. than cab down to AMK to find vynn..
dulan..

meiping || 10:22 PM

Date : Saturday, August 18, 2007

home now. busy with assignment.. boring.. >.<>











want see these can go J8.. think still there ba.. makes me so hungry! -_-!
oh ya.. i went to cut short my hair.. believe? =x




meiping || 9:35 PM

Date : Wednesday, August 15, 2007
boo! im bored!
damn bored now la!!!!!!!!!!!! *ROARS*
at Pearl Center now, weird hur, hw come im here.. hahas.
anyway, woke up early so school, im guai alright! ^^v
of coz im guai~ whaha!
met with ling at s-11, had breakfast..
than cabbed to school. had marketing todae.. boring..
lesson finish early nowaday.. end around 113oam..
ling went home, so lobang her cab to outram mrt..
im good! i came here to fetch xuefen! whahas! good right?! say im good hor!
xf finish school at 1pm.. >.< omg! i gonna bored to death soon..
nothing to shop here also! wth! all i see is uncle and auntie...
yucks! >.<
eh! i going crazy soon le la! fck!
mai write liao, lappy going low batt liao! sob!!!!!!!!!
!#$%^&*()_+

meiping || 12:32 PM

Date : Sunday, August 12, 2007
boi zailian!
after im home, after my fall! >.<
xf, with her new hair cut! =x



long long time ago de picture..

months ago i think.

anyway, disagreement rise.

but doesnt mean it wil affect our friendship de.

with disagreement there ought to deeper understanding in a friendship i guess.

anyway, hopes the words still stand strong..

the future we used to say during slacking time.

oh well... let see how fate goes ba.. ^^


anyway, i quitted maple last night? hahas. quitted..

might sound chidlish to sum ppl, but it is quite fun la! fun hor!

summore can get to knw sum real friends.. seriously, it nv cross my mind that i can find true or real friend in a online game. but well, i did..

but aiya, there is a time to stop the gaming and be serious. hahas.

anyway, slept around 7am todae.

woke up ard 4plus by sms and calls.

prepare changed and went to meet xf.

she went for her hair cut, aftermath had pasta for dinner.

ck came over to meet us.

met up with boiboi and his gang.

they had a little small and short gathering..

went down to suntec, met up with boi's shipmate.

boi and his shipmate slack at starbuck, while xf and me accompanied ck for dinner.

oh ya, it was already like 9pm close to 10pm.

hence the foodcourt was all close, end up he had KFC.

went back to join boiboi n co.

ard 11pm called cab and home sweet home.

bloody idiot! i fell down when i was abt to reach home.

-_-! painful la. >.<


bored!



meiping || 5:50 AM

Date : Saturday, August 11, 2007
i fell.. and i fell the hard way..
the hardest fall i hab..
seriously i doesnt wish to climb up and walk the path anymore..
the word is once again back in my mind..
im doing crazy thing.. which will scare them off..
i have enough of everyting..
the family the stress...
i had enough man.. really... its reaching the limit...
one more step and im gone. im sure..
it is silly and foolish.. but i hab no other path..
this my life.. i make the last choice of mine..
i choose my path. and which way to end my path...
my feeling doesnt matter to them at all.. never....
ever since young...
i wish to enbrace DEATH..

meiping || 9:06 PM

Date : Thursday, August 02, 2007
Back~ alright, im down with a very bad flu and cough.. >.<
the doctor reaction was like, ' eh?! u again?!' -.-!
hahas.
this yr health have been a bad one.. past few month was throat..
it was so serious tt the doc ask me nt to tok too much! rarh!
took me 1 whole month to recover...
and within another month im down with this stuipd flu~
making me so sleepy~ have a feeling my nose gonna drop off anytime! >.<
anyway, no school todae.. suppose to meet ling to do assignment..
end up.....................
never do......................
aiya! i gonna die le la! *bang wall*
oh ya.. recieved my result for Fudanmentals of Marketing and Principles of Business Management (1). i expected to flunk both of them... but!
i flunk PoBM(1) .. =x and managed to scape a D(pass) for FoM.
sian! need resit the paper.. >.<
i dont wan!!!!!!!!!!!! i hate PoBM la! the teacher is so boring, his lesson is soo soo soo DRY!

meiping || 9:03 PM

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