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LGO
Myriad of untold truth.
Date : Monday, November 30, 2009
Nowaday hardly blogs.. And even if i do blog, halfway thru i will stop and close the whole IE..
Hence it result in the short posts.. I just went to check my draft and post it.. Dont blame me for all those rubbish i typed.. Haha.. I have no idea myself too..
Well.. Will be having my interview with the school tml morning.. Needa to be there at 845.. gosh.. -.-! what a timing.. The interview will last for around 10-15min.. Which means everything will finish at 915 lastest.. -.-! But, i cant go home and sleep, cause there is lesson at 1215.. Sian la..
So what should i do during this long break time.. if i go home i doubt i will attend the afternoon lesson le..

It hasnt been a good year for me.. Down on luck.. Boring...
Incomes becoming lesser and lesser already... Seriously Money Never Enough la!
I can foresee that this month i will be broke before the 3rd week..
Babies is coming to sg this coming week.. Which means all expenes will be on me..
Sian la.. Hao lai bu lai, this time lai.. -.-!
Spare me a break la...

meiping || 12:31 AM

Date : Monday, November 23, 2009
There goes my 2 weeks of holidays! Its like i haven even start enjoy and playing yet..

Sian... Ended just like this... I miss primary and secondary school holidays.. Especially year end holidays.. almost 2 whole months so break time! awww.. How i miss those day... haha..

But i can pin for the next holidays, think is around 1 month! XD~

Ang bao ang bao~!



Hmmm......... Nowaday so broke sia... Dont know where i spent money.. =.=!

Seriously no idea.. -.-! Fly fly fly~

meiping || 2:09 AM

Date : Thursday, November 12, 2009
Hmmm.. I couldn't sleep even after tossing and turning on the bed for an hour..

Hence here im blogging.. But, i dont know what to blog also..

Holidays has started already! weee~ But, without knowing a week is gonna go by~

There goes my holidays.. Didnt do much also.. Been staying out late..

Playing mahjong and slacking! See! Really nothing much also.. -.-

Like a waste of holidays times hor.. But at least i dont need to force myself to sleep early everyday and wake up godamn know how early.. =p

meiping || 2:31 AM

Date : Monday, November 09, 2009
Love is such a funny thing.. Its comes so fast and goes so fast... Before i can even realise it everything has changed.. How i miss those time back.. The starting is always the sweetest baby..
i miss falling asleep in ur arms.. miss the way u used to hug me.. the kind of kiss is different from the past.. everything has changed..

"Love is... giving someone the power to break your heart, but trusting her/him not to."


The times when the love was still true.. The moment it is gone, it is gone.. both u and i have no confident will we be able to find the feeling back.. or maybe i already lost the trust in u.. and u have never try to gain back my trust..



What is love..

Wish to be far away from all these shit.. I never pin for a 24/7 hour company, nor hundreds over dollars gifts. All i pin is a faithful and truthful u..

I need some peace.. Or maybe some crazy nights out drinking my heart away! Its party time i guess! Lets have some fun.. =)


meiping || 3:03 AM

Date :
Finally! After so long, my long await holidays has come...
Lets Party~ ^^
Friday played mahjong with baby and co. Won abit.. yea~~
Played till the morning wee.. Stayed over at baby's house..
Continue to sleep after waking baby for work.. Slept till 4pm.. =X
Went home after washing up.. Changed and went to meet kaisi dar!!
Had dinner with her and went for pedicure..
Baby called half way.. End up, i have to go over TPY to accompany him..
Boring boring boring!
Anyway, had a great sunday! Went over to classmate house..
It was fun! haha.. Had dinner and played cards games

meiping || 2:11 AM

Date : Thursday, November 05, 2009
Super duper TIRED ar! SHAG!
But still in the mist of waiting for my hair to dry..
short update..

Hmmm.. Am finally done with all my assignments! =) phews~
Anyway, suppose to have an exam today but i was late..
wasnt able / allow to take the paper.. crap~ there will be a retest during the next term.. Find that it was a waste of time!
Reached there around 0945 and everything ended at 1015! However the time-table states that it is 9am to 3pm!
Went out with my classmates.. 12 of us went Liang Court..
Must really thanks baby for his discounts!
aftermath had dinner.. after dinner went prawning!
cut short of everything.. lazy to type every single things that happened.
hsh at 12plus..

2 more days to 6th of nov! holidays~
hopefully i can find sometime for the babies.. =)
hope i can make a trip back.. a few day would be good enough i guess..
argh.. super shag... so tired.. but eyes aint closing.. =.=!
crap! i should meet BB instead earlier on after prawning!
=(
gonna counts the sheeps..
Nights peeps..

meiping || 2:24 AM

Date : Wednesday, November 04, 2009
Hmm.. Finally got a chance to blog.. well.. not really a chance..
should say manage to catch the feeling.. =)
nowaday i keep thinking what do i want in my life..
what do i really want? the path ahead seems so blurred..
the vision seems so blur..
why am i working so hard now? rushing through all these work and stuffs..
taking in the stress and trouble..
who am i doing all these for? why am i the one doing all these?
what the hell is all these? what will i be in future..
why do human life.. why do human die?
why is there hurts and pain? why is all these happening?
why am i jealous of others? why am i so bothered?
there is still so much more... why all these qns doesnt seems to have any answer..
crap.. i hate it..
i hate feeling so uncertain about stuffs.. this is not my way of doing thing..
=(
but whatever it is... i only can conclude that this is life.....
fuck life... screw u! screw all the shits tt is happening around me.....

------------------------------------------------------

finally the long await holiday is coming.. =)
i have the intention of going back malaysia..
however.. i dont have the heart to carry it out.. ><
i dont knw whats the reason behind it too..
i just wish.. but i dont seems to be able to do it.....

sigh..........
thats all for now..

meiping || 2:21 AM

Date : Tuesday, October 06, 2009
Let Me Trust You
by Dawn

Everyday I get more afraid
Of giving my heart away
Scared of what love will bring
Too nervous to hear the words you’ll say
I find myself lost in you
Not sure if I want to be
I see the looks that you give
And wonder what you see in me
I don’t want my heart broken
But I am so in love
I can’t seem to give up
A guy sent from above
So I’m gonna trust you
Please don’t let me down
For I am giving you a chance
To turn my life around
Don’t take it for granted
‘Cause it might not last long
I have weak thoughts
And my heart isn’t too strong
I’m putting my life in your hands
Now it’s all up to youI look forward to the places we go
And the things we’ll be put through
But remember that I’m vulnerable
And I can’t stand to be hurt
I want to be at the top of your list
But I don’t have to be first
Believe me when I tell you
That I love you with all my heart
That I’m here for you forever and always
Just like I was at the start.

meiping || 3:42 AM

Date : Tuesday, September 29, 2009


Did i mention i went back Malaysia for a couple of days during Aug? I guess i missed it.. Anyway it was a short time, super rush! Think i went back for only 2D1N. Super rush and tired! What's with the rush right? Well, it was granny 1st year death anni. Suppose to have an interview for my internship, but i gave it a miss. I don't want to miss anything that have to do with granny. Its the only thing that can makes me remember her deeper, letting her news sinks in too. Cause till to day, i can't really accept the fact that she have left. Everytime i go back, i will walk to her room, hoping that i will see her. But it is fruitless i know.. But, i just can't stop myself from doing it.. Its like part of my routine when im back.. One of the few thing that i must do. They says, maybe granny has always been close with me, and that she is the first kins i lost ever since i have grow up, beside grandpa. Grandpa left when i was 4, hence not much memories of him. However granny has always been close with me, taking care of me, etc.. argh! i hate the feeling of missing someone so dearly..


No worries..... Im fine... I really am fine.. It is part of growing up! Give me sometime to learn and accept the fact. =) I will be better in time.. Loves..

*IMU

meiping || 2:44 AM

Date :
Hmmm..
I don't know why, but i kept having this kind of feeling and thinking..
My circle of friends are getting smaller and smaller..
Till there is only a handful of people around me.
I only meet a handful of them nowaday.
Sometime when i feel like going out, i take my hp and scroll through all the names, end up i didnt manage to find anyone. I might have lots of contacts. But none seems to match i guess? haha.. There is always reasons like, working, studying, dating, tired, too far, no money, no mood. So i will end up shopping alone, going out alone..
I remembered last time, it always used to have like 3-4 groups of friends.
One big bunch of peoples..
Now, it is so different, slowly, as time goes by, it is only left with a few.
I think i can even count with my 2 hands, or maybe to the extend of one hand.
Is it good or bad?
Or have i changed too much till friend couldn't accept and left?
Sometime, there isnt even a quarrel or disagreement, it just suddenly stop the contacts. So weird.. Maybe im not good enough i guess?
Bad temper? Too crazy? Talk too much? Too lazy? Bad smoker? Well.. Who knows..
Just a thought only..
Maybe.. there handful are the only ones i need in my life i guess.. Those whom really stayed and accompanied me. =)
The real truth, of True Friends.

thanks to U. =) Yes U.. =)

-----------------------------------

PS: Jw, ever since u left it seems like u took a part of me with u.. =(
I remebered, no matter how busy our life is, we always made time for each other. u know i dislike the way kristy treat me, thats why u always put in such a big effort to not make the mistake kristy did. Really happy about it u know? ^^ But, once u find a girl u like, i really hate it. maybe it is jealous ba? haha.. i dont knw.. not those kind of love jealousy.. =p but now i realised i kinda of miss the jealousy feeling.. haha.. im always ur lil sissy, u are always my big bro.. i really miss u..
the late nights drinking, singing, slacking, mahjong.. i really miss it.. even ur disturb calls in the middle of the nights, those stupid msgs.. =(
awww.. fast come back! missssssssssssssssssssss youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!!!!!! ='(

meiping || 2:06 AM

Date : Sunday, September 20, 2009
給你的一番話:
如果不喜歡你 就不用在乎你和別的女生打打鬧鬧

如果不喜歡你 就不用心痛你對別的女生溫柔體貼

如果不喜歡你 就不用想到你對我是喜歡抑或討厭

如果不喜歡你 就不用為了你一個眼神而心慌意亂

如果不喜歡你 就不用想盡辦法忘掉你給我的失望

如果不喜歡你 就不用讓自己變得善變又三心二意

如果不喜歡你 就不用害怕同學調查我對你的感覺

如果不喜歡你 就不用時時注意自己的言行舉止

如果不喜歡你 就不用天天為了你吃醋而生悶氣

如果不喜歡你 就不用每每在乎你經過我的身旁

如果不喜歡你 就不用三不五時觀望你在何處

如果不喜歡你 就不用時時刻刻找尋你的蹤影

如果不喜歡你 就不用留意你的任何眼光意見

如果不喜歡你 就不用因你不理我而傷心難過

如果不喜歡你 就不用一致把自己武裝起來

如果不喜歡你 就不用在夜裡想起你的冷漠而偷偷心傷

如果不喜歡你 就不用為了朋友捏造的流言而尷尬無措

如果不喜歡你 就不用因你的誤會而擔心不安

如果不喜歡你 就不用憂心自己在你眼中多麼沒有價值

如果不喜歡你 就不用記得你是讓我第一個掉淚的男孩

偏偏我就是喜歡你。。。
所以以上的傻事我都做過了。。
但在另一端的你會知道嗎???
我是你的傻瓜嗎????


说了又不听
听了又不懂
不懂又不问
问了又不做
做了又做错
错了又不认
认了又不改
改了又不服
不服有不说

meiping || 4:00 AM

Date :
=)

一生中10件无能为力的事
1 、倒向你的墙:也许这面倒向你的墙,让你无法呼吸,也许会让你失去一切,但是如果沉默的接受,那么,倒向你的还是那面墙,如果你挺起肩膀,抬起头来你会发现很多事情不是向我们想象的那么糟。

2、 离你而去的人:离你远去的人,是他失去了你,不是你失去了他。离开,也许是为了下个路口的更好的重逢。

3 、流逝的时间:时间比水流失的还要快,所以想做的事情就去努力,人这辈子,至少自己得对得起自己。

4、 没有选择的出身:有人天生的就是王,有人天生的就是贵族,但是很多人天生的就是平凡,这个世界上,没有什么不可以改变的东西,尤其你想改变的话。

5 、莫名其妙的孤独:不管达观还是拘谨,无论高贵还是卑微,谁都可能遭遇孤独的感觉,常常深深地萦绕在不为人所知的寂寞的情怀中。

6、 无可奈何的遗忘:很多我们以为一辈子都不会忘记的事情,就在我们念念不忘的日子里,被我们遗忘了。

7 、永远的过去 :一秒就成为了下一秒的过去,既然很多东西注定要失去的,那么,我们唯一可以做到的就是不轻易忘记。

8、 别人的嘲笑:嘴长在别人的身上,耳朵在自己身上,说不说,是他们的事情,听不听,是你自己的事情了,我们要学会微笑的面对这一切。

9 、不可避免的死亡:生命是个过程,死亡只是必然的结果,但轨迹是自己的色彩和温度,既然不可避免,那么就更无所畏惧。

10 、无可救药的喜欢:一种很甜的毒药,戒不掉的东西,但喜欢终究是喜欢,不是爱。

生活中,并不是自己努力就一定什么都可以的。很多时候,我们也会觉得自己无能为力。不只是你,也不只是我,大家都一样。知道时间不可能停留,就没有必要伤春悲秋;知道感情不可能刻意,就不会为了谁寻死觅活;知道遗忘总是必然的,就不会为一时的忘却伤感;知道过去始终是存在的,就没有必要遮掩和炫耀;知道孤独总是如影随形的,就不会在某一些时刻难以自制;知道死亡总是在将来的某一刻,就能好好把握现在能做好的。;知道这些,就不必勉强为难自己,心放开了,就什么都好了。心放淡一点,再淡一点,没有那么多给自己设置的心结,心境也就平和了。

-------------------------------------------

1、不要在流眼泪的时候做任何决定,情绪负面的时候说话越少越好。

2、不要去反复思考同一个问题,不要把所有的感情都放在一个人身上,你还有父母,有朋友。

3、不要害怕做错什么,即使错了,也不必懊恼,人生就是对对错错,何况有许多事,回头看来,对错已经无所谓了。

4、有负面情绪是正常的,但是自己一定要知道,要明白这只是生活的一小部分,在其余时间里,要尽量的让情绪平稳起来。   

5、那个人,突然不联系你了,很正常;那个人,突然又联系你了,也很正常,这什么也不说明。

6、如果不懂,就说出来,如果懂了,就别说,笑笑即可。   

7、一切的烦恼都是自找,因此也只能自己解决,不要找朋友哭诉,找他们去打球。

8、说过的话一定要做到,即使是很蠢的话,再蠢也比言而无信好。  

9、无论发生怎样的变故,不要打破生活原有的规律,要按时吃饭,按时睡觉。

10、不要去害怕做一件事,不要害怕触景伤情,不要害怕说错话,不要害怕想起过去,不要害怕面对未来。

11、无论是对是错,你需要有一个准则,你的行为应该遵循这个准则,并根据现实生活不断的修正。反反复复优柔寡断的人,是不可能讨人喜欢的.在对错之间徘徊的人,形象不如从错到对的人正面。   

12、当他说:“让我们冷静一段时间好吗?”的时候,要冷静的说好,然后挂掉电话。不要哀求,他不是来征求你的意见的。   

13、不要把心底的话全掏出来,这些是只属于你的财富。   

14、不要和一个人和他议论同一个圈子里的人,不管你认为他有多么可靠。

15、当你不知道和他说什么的时候,那就什么也不要说,沉默有无限种含义。  

16、不要追求什么结果,每个人结果都一样,就是死亡。   

17、不要后悔,无论怎样都不要后悔,后悔的情绪比你所做错的事更加可怕,因为这会摧毁你的自信,自尊以及很有可能让你去做一件更错的事。

18、无论遇到什么事情,都要对自己说:这是正常的。而不要说:我怎么这么倒霉?或是:他怎么这样?那些遇到汶川地震,911或印尼海啸的人很多都没有机会抱怨了。比起他们,生活中的一些波折都是正常的,今天也许你的男朋友离你而去,你会觉得自己是世界上最惨的人,但是别忘了也许这世上同时有几十万个姑娘和你有着同样的遭遇,只是你不知道而已。

19、不要担心嫁不出去,更不要因为年纪大了草率结婚,担心嫁不出去总比担心老公出轨要离婚,小三抢财产要好.担心嫁不出去只是担心而已,心情好了还照样过原来的日子,老公真要离婚那才是真的麻烦。   

20、一定要明白,自己所做的一切都是为了追寻一种状态,一种自我的满足感和幸福感.不要害怕什么,这世上可供害怕的事太多了,你是害怕不完的。有事情,就解决,不能解决,那就拉倒。

21、最后一条,女人想过得好一些,还是要走内在男人化,外在女人化的路啊!

---------------------------------------

十六种寂寞,总有一种属于你
(一)

我微笑着,冷漠地看着身边的每个人,那是一中歇斯底里的微笑,两种极端的交点。

我已忘了怎样去哭。

一个人坐在角落里,我面无表情地笑着冰冷的墙壁,汲取着手中热茶的唯一一点热量。

看着嬉笑的人群,依旧微笑,我的悲伤和眼泪没人发觉。
 
(二)
 
血不断从手上的伤口中涌出来,我忘了痛,任新鲜的血液一滴滴地坠落在地板上。突然,我发现自己的血不是鲜红色的,它的颜色与寂寞相同。

我已忘了寂寞的颜色。

(三)

我与寂寞同一国度,这或许是我的宿命。黑暗里我点起一支蜡烛,昏黄的火焰轻轻地跳动着,那是寂静的心跳。蜡烛然尽,黑暗吞噬了我,吞噬了一 切,没有反抗,没有挣扎。

我早已习惯了漆黑一片。

独自走在深夜无人的街,我的世界仍然只有我自己,寒冷和无奈悄悄地蔓延,我与痛苦为伍,与寂寞相伴。

(四)
 
沸腾的白开水不停地冒着热气,我呆呆地看着它,手里的香烟不知道何十已经燃尽,思绪一点一点地飞离我的身体。

我问自己在想什么?

我还能做什么?

不断地问着自己,没有回答。

我已经习惯了质疑自己。

没有思想,却有呼吸,清晰地呼吸,我可以听得见自己心跳的声音。有力地一下一下,我到底还是活着的。
 
(五)

打开电脑,听见鼠标和键盘在宁静的夜里发出清脆的声音。qq上没有人。突然有人要求通过身份验证,在她的自我介绍一栏,我看见了一句颇有道理的话:"因为无聊所以上网,上了网却更寂寞!"

毫不犹豫地,我握着鼠标按下了"通过验证",然后下线,关闭了电脑。躺在床上,双眼望着天花板,不停想着那句话。

原来,我早已习惯了无聊。
 
(六)
 
我的生命没有意义,我的生活没有快乐,因为无奈,由于无情。没有目标,我以自己独特的方式活着,活在自己的世界中。

走在路上,不去理会那些指点和冷眼,我依然从容坚定地向前走着,脸上还是挂着莫名的微笑。生命中的过客,何必念念不忘,那你是否也只是我的过客?想起你,我收起笑容,停下了脚步,抬头看看天,不是蓝色的,是寂寞的颜色。

亲爱的,我无法强迫自己不去想你。
 
(七)
 
窝在转椅上,习惯性的点燃一 支香烟,久违的思绪侵袭着我。桌上放着一个手表和一 张相片,我没有去碰它们,闭上眼睛,感受着香烟带给我的寂寞。

我已习惯了封闭自己。

冰冷的手上忽然感觉到了温暖,原来是滚烫的泪水,我以为自己早已没有了眼泪。
 
(八)
 
天使有翅膀,我没有,所以我不是天使。

魔鬼有魔力,我没有,所以我不是魔鬼。

我有的,是无奈、绝望和孤独的自由。

心底的希望和绝望激烈地斗争着,获胜的却是无奈。我已学会了接受无奈,向无奈妥协。


天使的缺点是太善良,魔鬼的缺点是太邪恶,我的缺点是太懦弱。
 
(九)
 
轻轻地闭上眼睛,使劲、贪婪地呼吸着没有你的空气。是自由?还是思念?我无法回答自己,原来没有你的空气如此地稀薄。

我也学会了去适应空气的稀冷。

笑过、哭过、吵过、闹过,如今我需要的,只是冷漠。
 
(十)
 
明媚的阳光透过窗子,暖暖地照在我的身上。睁开眼睛,用手挡了挡刺眼的光线,蒙上被子,我准备继续被打断的美梦。

美梦一旦被惊醒便无法在延续。气恼地从床上坐起身来,双手支着头,我的头发凌乱地垂了下来。梦醒了。我对自己苦笑着摇摇头,带着绝望去接受现实,去迎接毫无意义的新的一天。

我已习惯了一成不变的生活。

(十一)
 
"背影是真的,人是假的,没什么执着,一百年前你不是你,我不是我,悲哀是真的,泪是假的,本来没因果,一百年后没有你也没有我。"

恍惚之间我仿佛看见了你,伸出手,却只触碰到一片空白。我知道,一百年后你依然会是你,只是少了我的思念。
 
(十二)
 
风吹乱了我的头发,我不在意,慢慢地走在寒冬的街头。我麻木地移动着,有点模糊,隐隐约约看见你在我的前方,一步一步向前,你却离我越来越远。

我拼命地向你狂奔,知道你在我的眼前消失。停下脚步大口大口地喘着粗气,我开始笑,笑自己的傻,笑自己的愚蠢。

(十三)
 
房间里,书本堆满了整个桌子,我坐在堆积如山的书本面前,叹了口气。沉默了片刻,我突然站起来,伸手抓过那些令人乏味的破书,用力地朝四周的墙上扔去,然后把自己重重地摔在床上。

许久,我起身把那些书一本一本拾起来,重新放到桌子上,无可奈何地笑笑,把自己埋进了书堆。
 
(十四)
 
坐在转椅上,我把脸深深地埋进自己的臂弯,眼泪竟这样涌了出来。我不断做着深呼吸,企图平抚心里的波动,可我控制不了自己。

(十五)
 
我卸下了虚伪的微笑,摆出一张疲倦的脸。对你的眷恋依旧,我以学会了隐藏,却学不会将我的爱收回。

(十六)

我依然是我自己。追忆中的种种关于你.将哭不出的眼泪化作努力,分开的天空让彼此染出彩色.喜欢大雨淋透我身的感觉`~ 这时就可以让烦劳,孤独,寂寞统统洗刷掉~~~~

我的生活依然一如既往地平静,唯一的波动就是想你时的泪水。

 

诱惑,我们的距离以光年计算。

---------------------------------------
如今的我生活好象在演戏
说着言不由衷的话
总是拿着微不足道的成熟来骗自己
总是莫名其妙感到一阵的空虚

烦恼因人而有,仇恨因爱而生。。。

没有解决不了的事,只有不想被解决得。。。


MUHAHA! super duper long post..
haha.. in the mist of doing my assignment the loading is so darn long..
so i suft the net and *poof* i found these.. keke!
ENJOY!

meiping || 3:39 AM

Date : Saturday, September 19, 2009
Busy busy! Having such a hetic weekend! In total chaos state now.. =.=!
So many things to do, and yet so little time~
*Faints*
Currently
6 assignments on hand..
3 wedding dinner to attend..
2 birthday coming up..
2 farewell party..
All these events is going to burn and has burnt a very big hole in my pocket. =(
Now is Money Never Enough, not Money Not Enough le.. hahas.

That's all for now..
Will try to blog again..
Ciaos..

meiping || 7:59 PM

Date : Friday, September 11, 2009
i guess, im reaching the limit already..
i really cant hold on anymore..
maybe it is time to really end it..
but before that, i need to work my plan out first..
if i can tahan for the past 1yr.
i believe a few more month wont kills. =)
watch out for me..
im so sick of myself for crying.
im so sick of the tearing more then u are.
do u think tearing is just like opening a tap?
hahaha. no.. trust me.. i hate it more then u..
i get more fan then u do..
u wan a simple life? dont tell me that, becoz no ones want a simple life more then i do. and dont ask me to define simple life for u..
coz such a simple thing to u is a such a diffcult task..
tsk tsk tsk..
u are such a disgrace..
and seriously, all that u are doing are making me hate u.
please cont to do it..
let all the love turn into hate..
and i will thanks u for it.
i really will be so thankful for it!
come on and try me..
push me to my limit if tts ur plan..
lets see who is able to win this game in the end.
u wan try my level of limit? haha.. we shall see..

alright! im out of here for tonight! ^^

meiping || 11:10 PM

Date :
Been almost a month since my last update.
And i just found out, the host for my old blog img has been removed.
Sad to say, i didnt save the background img for backup.
I kinda of like tt background img, simple and nice. =)
Some more it moves! But too bad, i couldn't find any nice blogskins like the previous one. This is the best that i could find.
Hmm.. Actually, nothing special about this skin too.

School working is piling up, high high up to the celling!
Time to clear the work soon. =)
School has been pretty good to me, classmates are so helpful when it comes to attendance marking, they are pretty nice! Thanks~

I caught a couple of movies this month, nice movies.
waiting for 'the ugly truth' hope it will be nice too.

Oh, i remembered celebrating weijun's 21th birthday!
bought a cake and went down Bishan Park's Explorer ( no very sure of the name )

人生如戏,戏如人生
this 8 word is so true..
i just felt that my life is like a drama.
a drama with a script that has not been completed yet.
im like the actoress with no idea what is coming up next.
makes me feel so insecure.
i wanna a normal life more then anyone else in the world.
i really do.
it just keep getting worst, instead of better..
sometime i will just keep thinking that it was a bad dream only.
once im awake, everything will be back to normal.
but weird huh, i never seems to be able to wake up from the dream.
it makes me so tired.. =(

meiping || 10:15 PM

Date : Monday, September 07, 2009
crazy crazy crazy...
going insane soon?
haha..

why do i keep thinking about the past recently?
why do the past memories keep haunting me..
hmmm.. is it regrets?
but why do i feel regrets out of the sudden?
i always thoughts that im good with this kind of stuffs..
once decision is made i wont regret..
but suddenly, the past just flash thru..
reminding me of so much stuffs..
if the decision in the past was to leave..
how will things be now?
will my life be better? or worst?
just so irony..

nowadays so much weird thing keep happening..
why why why? so much why again..
dam.. hate it...
maybe it is good to stay away from the crowd for sometime..
clear mind...
stop myself from thinking about all these..

bored...
=(

meiping || 3:10 AM

Date : Friday, August 28, 2009
有时候问自己, “值得吗?”
得到的答案又不确定。

选择了相信, 得来的却是一次又一次的失望。
选择了放弃, 又不舍得。
选择继续, 又怕受到伤害。

这个考验, 真的太难了。

--------------------------------

I'm not ready for this... I'm not.. Not at all ready..
Mentally nor physically prepared.. I didn't see it coming at all..
It happened so fast, out of nowhere, without any warning..
How did it happened? Why did it happened?
So many question marks to all these stuff..
And most weird is HOW can it happen?
It seems totally out of question..
I have no idea how in the hell am i gonna handle it?
All i know is to avoid, avoid and avoid..
I know i'm running away from it, avoiding thing won't solve the problem.
But u can't blame me, am totally clueless!
This is the first time i encounter such stuff..
Someone tell me what should i do?
Can't there be only friendship between a man and a woman?
I always believe it is possible to maintain a pure friendship.
Well, at least it is now still growing strong... Jiewei and Me..
The kind of pure friendship... It is so hard to find and maintain..
Never mind, i will still have faith in the pure friendship between man and woman..
As long as my friendship with Jiewei stand.. I will believe in it.. ^^
*jiayou to myself*
Really hope this thing will come to an end soon..
=(
Don't wish anymore of this shit to happen..

dead tired
mentaly..
go, went, gone..
end of this post..

meiping || 1:57 AM

Date : Saturday, August 22, 2009
I actually have a lot of stuffs to write down..
A lot of feelings, thinking and thoughts.
But when i really open up this page, and begin typing i'm lost for words.
Weird huh? Haha..
Anyway, school has already started for me..
Trying my best to mix around with my classmates.
Hope thing goes well.. =)

I really don't know what's in the relationship that im looking for.
i mean, maybe im lost? Haha..
There are other guys whom are so much better.
I know, and seen. Maybe more, ever since i started to stick to my feeling.
Not being controlled anymore by Anto.
I manage to know more friends, met more people.
But, im still not ready for a new relationship.
I don't mean, break with Anto and straight away start a new relationship.
What i mean is, after Anto, i doubt i will get into relationship.
I don't want another guy to mess up my life anymore.
I want to be in control, i believe in future, i will be stronger.
Time allows ones to grows and mature.
Time allows ones to see through the surface of everything..
Time allows ME to learn the lesson.
Have a break, have a kit-kat! Enjoying my freedom now. =)

Mixed feeling is making thing worst, why do i feel more and more fan gan by her.
Everything she does just makes me feel so, even if it for my own good, or like what other says, she just care.
But i just dislike it.
I'm biase. Freaking, fucking biase, i dont deny that, and i won't..
Haha..
Im evil, im the devil.. =)

Crazy as it might sound, i miss u..
Am i going through the stage of puppy love? HAHA!
What a nice thinking, puppy love? HA..HA..HA..
The biggest joke is, i haven even met u in real before..
This is so fucking crazy..
Argh, forget this.. -.-
Im going crazy.. =p

meiping || 1:43 AM

Date : Sunday, August 16, 2009
Super Dupar long entry! Just words and words as usual =)

BOO! 2 weeks of holiday just ended like that!
Haha.. I doubt i made good use of the 2 weeks holiday.. =(
Been staying home for most of the time!
BORING! 快闷死了!
Well, don't have the usual drinking and mahjong-ing session too!
Okay, maybe just one drinking and mahjong session.. =p

Let me recall some of the events..
I remembered going to Neverland with anto..
I will always remember it! AARON!
Met up with Lance and co.
Slack there till almost 2am.
Have to leave earlier due to some stuff.. Dont worry, not those kind of lians and bengs too..
AND! Aaron puked! Puking is alright, but it kena me! =((
Lucky i was wearing dress instead of jeans that day.. =.=!

Must be wondering why there is anto's name again right?
We are back together, but, oh well, thing is different now..
I don't know how to pin it down, but it is different already..
Not that i dont love him, or he dont love me..
It is just different..
I still love this quote ' Nothing will be the same again! '
HAHA! Sound very 熟 hor! =p

But nevertheless, im happy? i guess im..
Not due to the patch..

Next thing is mahjong session yesterday at yl's house..
Woots! Super hard-core..
hahas.. Everyone is feeling kinda of 困!
But we still 挨 untill morning!

Oh ya! I took my oath/vow whatever u call it.. =)
Waiting for my passport now!
I wanna eat Kenny Roger at City Square~ ANYONE WANT? LOL
Craving for seafood too! Stingrays, Kang Kong, Sotong, Prawns, CHILLI CRAB at the back alley too! =p
Been going down to Liang Court almost every day..
I swear im getting sick of bus 54 and Jap food soon!
YES! Very soon! >.
Did i mention holiday is ending? =(
Tml will be the 1st day of school, am so discourage by the timing of the lesson..
Argh! Worst time-table ever!!!! =((
Just hope it will be a better term..
要加油了! ^.^

meiping || 2:20 PM

Date : Friday, July 31, 2009
Just when i though everything was perfect, it wasn't.
It wasn't even close to perfect at all.
Trust lies on a thin line......
To trust or not to trust.......
Worth trusting anot is another thing...

If you can’t get someone out of your head, then maybe they’re supposed to be there.

'Cause I'm sick of the stabbing, I'm sick of the breaking, I'm sick of the bleeding until we fall down -- sick of this circle of death that we dance through again and again. Just lay me in the ground; let's fall asleep together. Hold me darling because I'm scared ... and I can't do this alone

You’d think after all this time, I’d be over you. I actually was … but then, like you promised, we were together again for a while … and everything came rushing back – the memories, the kisses, the fun – and I just fell, all over again.

Not much updates, just some quotes. =) enjoy!

today marks an end of 1st term for school.. =)
so fast, its already the last day of july!
2 month has past ever since school started..
=)
2 week breaks and everything will be back the same again..
it would be school school school again...
2nd term's time table is making me pretty sad i guess.. =(
sigh... i prefer the 1st term time table.. even tot i have to wake up in the morning..
well im fine with the morning lesson... in fact it is so much better..

reading is good..... love reading........ =))
indulge ~ enjoy ~ immense ~ relax ~
hmmm i guess i will be willing to spend my whole money pocket money buying books!
cope myself at home everyday and bury myself with books..
not school book.. just storybooks... =))
ah.. new interest, some chi novel manage to catch my eyes!
haha.. busy reading it now.. keke... <3~

meiping || 1:21 PM

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